Vince Shlomi, my favorite informercial pitchman, known for his ShamWow and SlapChop ads and Looney Tune-like demeanor, was arrested last month for beating the shit out of a hooker. How this stayed under the radar for so long, I dunno, but Smoking Gun just broke the story:

Shlomi, 44, was arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she “propositioned him for straight sex.” Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly “bit his tongue and would not let go.” Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue.

What a testy hooker! Good thing the ShamWow can soak up three gallons of blood! Looks like Vince took a good beating, but in a classic case of “you should see the other guy…” well, you should really see the other guy. Check out mugs of what’s left of the hooker here. She looks like something from Nightbreed. Vince Shlomi is the Chris Brown of johns.

- Oh Mars