Tyson Leak’d
I just finished watching a leak of the new Mike Tyson documentary and I must admit it was a bit overwhelming. The level of hilarity that is woven together by a documentary executively produced and narrated by Mike Tyson is not something you can fully absorb in one viewing.
To begin with, it was absurdly biased (as you would only expect) and only gave a little insight into Tyson’s boxing career and famous exploits. What the movie did pay lots of attention to however, was illustrating in graphic detail many of Iron Mike’s sexual fantasies. I actually had a pen ready when I watched this flick, fully anticipating amazing quotables. Here is Mike’s idea of a perfect woman word for word:
“I like a strong woman like a CEO of a company. I want a strong woman and then I want to dominate her sexually… like a tiger that watches their prey after they wound it.”
From here Mike starts talking about his attitude towards partners during sex:
“I love saying no all the time when I’m making love. When they ask for something it’s no.”
The best part of these segments is that they are all done with voice over footage of fat Nu-Tyson walking down a beach during a sunset edited beside a picture of his face in deep thought. I couldn’t begin to make this shit up even if I tried. Some other highlights of the movie include listening to Tyson murder the English language, recite poetry and cry.
- Dr. No
April 22nd, 2009 at 1:51 am
lol i must see this
April 22nd, 2009 at 2:05 am
I need to download this asap.
April 22nd, 2009 at 2:08 am
I can’t wait.
April 22nd, 2009 at 2:56 am
haha! email me the leak link!
April 22nd, 2009 at 7:43 am
Dr. No, I can has?
April 22nd, 2009 at 9:21 am
dude… i needed some comedy, this will be the perfect remedy! Thanks for the heads-up because i was totally in the dark on this. MIKKKEEEY!
April 22nd, 2009 at 3:09 pm
“I won’t talk nice to you, and [i'll] talk about fornicating with you and letting you suck my dick because if I was eloquent with you, you’d still look at me as a scumbag.” – Mike Tyson
April 23rd, 2009 at 12:59 am
can someone email me the link to watch this film? thanks
April 23rd, 2009 at 2:29 am
You mention the cry…
He couldn’t even do it. He just started talking like he was passing kidney stones in an attempt to show some real human emotion. I dodn’t buy it.
April 23rd, 2009 at 1:43 pm
@ Dr.NoInHsinchu: Just because a fire-hydrant’s worth of water wasn’t coming from his eyes, means he wasn’t ‘crying’ or emotional? I mean he seemed genuinely choked up and upset. Trust me. That whole choked-up-lose-your-voice-can’t-talk thing ain’t easy to fake.
April 23rd, 2009 at 4:51 pm
I believed that Tyson was genuinely choked up because I don’t think he’s clever enough to fake anything. He seems to have a hard enough time conveying his real feelings without confusing himself. Faking emotions is on a whole other level that Tyson will view from afar.
Btw Dr.NoInHsinchu:
Wuddup homie? How the Taiwanese birds treating you>?
April 24th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
I know, my acronyms are mad clever.
The “scene” seemed like it had been practiced before. Ya’ll actually believe Mike Tyson still possesses the ability to express real, human emotions?
What, did he fuck you till you loved him… faggots?
April 27th, 2009 at 2:31 pm
Actually, he had me at kicking kids in their fucking heads.