Sporting Observations: NHL 2009-2010 Preview
Tonight, the NHL returns!
It’s time: Leaves coming down, wind picking up, windows closed at night. October kicked through the door early this morning, the daylight savings switch lurks in one of these upcoming weekends, and – fuckin finally - the puck is about to drop. By the time the weekend’s over, the first wins and losses of the 2009-2010 campaign will be in the books. The Pens will have begun their title defense, Ovechkin will probably have netted a couple, Heatley will have donned Shark turquoise, Brodeur will have played his 1000th NHL game, and angry phone calls will have lit up Philly sports radio switchboards demanding to know why Pronger hasn’t won the Flyers a Cup yet.
Yeah, in just a few hours, the marathon run that is hockey season will have begun – a run that’ll take us, as it always does, straight into the frozen depths of darkest winter, those howling late December nights when the world is a wasteland of sleet and snow and wind. On those frostblasted nights, I’ll be equipped with my own wintry mix – a hissing radiator, a fridge full of beer and the beloved Center Ice package on the box – to get me through. Hockey brethren, I trust you have comparably comfortable arrangements. I hope so; it’s a hell of a ride – the way the games see you through the darkness and into the spring thaw and playoff races. And this year we’ve got the Olympics, too, for anthems and nationalism and big-ass rinks. Goddamn. I can’t wait. Hockey’s back.
Ok. Right now, it’s October 1. The Isles are still tied for the conference lead, and I’ve still got a couple hours left to sneak in a season preview.
For my preview, I’m skipping the bullshit: no high school yearbook lyric snippets (fuckin Buccigross, ya big dork), no letter grades, no haikus. I’m keeping it clean – ranking the teams by where I think they’ll finish in the conference, offering a quick take on each squad, and getting out. Let’s go – see you in the comments.
EASTERN CONFERENCE
1. Washington Capitals
The Pens are the champs, but to me the Caps look to be the class of the conference this year. Besides #8 – who’s gotta be a favorite for what would be his third Hart Trophy – the Caps picked up yet more weapons in Knuble and Brendan Morrison, adding to an already burgeoning arsenal. (Full disclosure: Backstrom’s the centerpiece of my Death Adders FHL squad, the Fightin’ Malarchuks.) Goaltending’s kind of a concern, but these dudes are stacked – hell, they’ve got a defenseman who’s a legitimate candidate for 40 goals, on top of being a +24. Washington’s gonna come out with a chip on their shoulder after getting knocked out last year in the 2nd round by the next team on my list, and I see them going deep into the spring after picking up some postseason experience last year.
2. Pittsburgh Penguins
Hell of a Finals last year, and for all the squawking about Crosby’s post-win handshake snub, I was kinda glad Pittsburgh exorcised their demons and vanquished Detroit. It was a good story: Struggling to stay in the East’s top 8 at midseason, the Pens caught fire after Bylsma replaced Therrien in February and rode on out to glory and the White House. But this year they’ve lost some firepower (Sykora, Satan) and some grit (Scuderi), and their division got better. Nevertheless, the Pens will be dangerous when it counts and are an obvious threat to repeat.
3. Boston Bruins
Milan Lucic is a fuckin beast. I am tempted to end right there, but unfortunately for their division rivals, the Bruins also boast the Vezina Trophy winner in Tim Thomas and scoring depth that made Phil “Mono” Kessel expendable. Add lumbering village idiot Zdeno Chara, who is kinda the Andre the Giant of the league, and the Bears win the Northeast, easy. I wouldn’t be surprised if they finished the year at the top of the East, instead of the third slot I’ve pegged them for.
4. Philadelphia Flyers
I swore at my TV when I heard that Philly nabbed Pronger because that man’s gonna terrorize the East. Coupled with Carter and Richards, there’s star power on this team, and if the midget ever gets it together, the Flyers could make it to the conference finals. But that’s only if the volatile Ray Emery, fresh from his Russian jaunt, can keep it together in the crease. He’s done it before – people forget too quick the success he had during the Senator’s Cup run back in 2007.
5. Carolina Hurricanes
The Canes got hot at the end last year and that made this choice a little easier, because I was wavering on them. Fifth is still probably a little high for them, but fuck it. After Staal Brother #1, there’s not a lot of pop, but there is depth on offense: Whitney, Ruutu, Cole, an aging Brind’Amour. The Canes have faith in Cam Ward, re-upping for 6 years, and I’m not mad at that. The blueline lost some dudes like young Anton Babchuk (KHL), but I still like Corvo, who’s in a contract year, and adding Aaron Ward should help. Canes benefit from playing in the Southeast.
6. New Jersey Devils
The Crook, your pal and mine, asked me to slap some lazy sportswriters here by debunking an oft-repeated fallacy. Yo, hockey preview writers: Just because Jacques “Ol Jeezy” Lemaire replaces Brent Sutter behind the bench in Jersey once more, that doesn’t mean that the Devils are gonna be resuscitating their former trademark boring-ass trap-or-die kinda D. Au contraire: Lemaire trapped in Minnesota because Gaborik was busted and the rest of the offense… well, there wasn’t one. Lemaire has publicly scorned the 1-2-2 in recent days, and even the NY Times knows what time it is. Like Shanahan – who actually just left the Devils today after learning he wouldn’t be on the top three lines – said: “Once one junkyard dog starts to bark, they all start to bark. They don’t know what they’re barking at. But that’s the way it works.” So yeah, I see Zach Parise scoring a billion goals, Brodeur being Brodeur once more, and the Devils skating solidly into the postseason playing some… gasp… uptempo forechecking hockey. Watch David Clarkson play big this year. Side note: I ate 9 hot dogs during a Sabres-Devils game at The Rock last year. It was dollar dog night; I was paying in quarters by the third. Best thing about the place is the way the whole arena glows read when the Devils are on the PK and everyone chants KILL… KILL… KILL.
7. Buffalo Sabres
Homer pick! For real though, Buffalo lost Miller and Vanek down the home stretch last year and that was all it took for my Swords to miss the playoffs for the second straight year. I know, I know: every team has injuries, every team has to play banged-up. But I like Lindy’s boys to make it to April this year, biggest reason being that all the young dudes are a year older. This is a young team, and they probably needed to fuck up for a couple years post-Drury and Briere to figure themselves out. While the Sabres didn’t add any offensive firepower, just adding Grier and swapping Spacek for Montador, they still pack a punch: Noted alien Thomas Vanek led the league in PP goals last year, Tim Connolly is healthy, Derek Roy is sobering up. If Pominville can repopulate once more, and Miller stays healthy, playoff hockey will return to Western New York. Save us the Goo Goo Dolls montages this year though, Darcy.
8. Toronto Maple Leafs
Yup, I have the Leafs making it. A Northeast bias? Maybe, but I like what Brian Burke is doing up there and I’m buying the hype. Lookit that top 4 D: Beauchemin, Komisarek, Kaberle, Schenn. That’s solid. Add Kessel, who’ll be gone til November, and dudes like Stajan and Grabovski, and you’re starting to get a little offensive kick. If super Swede Jonas Gustavsson is the answer in net, they’ll make a run. As much as I hate to admit it, I think Toronto is doing it the right way after a long time in the wilderness.
9. New York Rangers
What team has disappointed more in recent years? Despite the megabucks raining from the owners’ box at MSG, I don’t see the Rangers climbing up the standings any. I put over/under on Gaborik at 30 games. Too many holes on D, Chris Drury slowing down some, no more Gomez, no more Zherdev… I don’t know. It’s gonna hurt. King Henry is solid, and Potvin may still suck, but I think the Blueshirts can’t quite claw their way in this year.
10. Montreal Canadiens
Nasty little year last year for Montreal, a storied franchise celebrating the century mark. Like the kid on the Liquid Swords intro says, maybe that was the problem – did the 100 years worth of ghosts watching from the rafters get to them? Sure, they squeaked into the yoffs, but they got bounced quick, and disappointment was heavy. Looking to rebound, the Habs have reshuffled the deck heavily, adding Scott Gomez, Brian Gionta, Mikey Cammalleri, Jaro “Akroyd” Spacek, Paul Mara, and Hal Gill. However, they’ve also ditched half the team: Matthieu Schneider, Saku Koivu, Mike Komisarek, Alex Kovalev, Alex Tanguay. I’m not sold on Carey Price in net. Jeez, I dunno… I don’t see them being any better, but let’s fight in the comments about it.
12. Ottawa Senators
Heatley’s gone, and good riddance. Jesus, what an annoying offseason story that was. Unfortunately, Cheechoo and Michaelek, while a decent return, won’t be enough to push the Sens to the playoffs this year. Cheechoo’s out of gas – was he juicing in 2005-06, when he scored 56 goals? – and Michaelek may take to his new surroundings nicely, but we’ll see. They’ve still got Spezza and Alfredsson, and Volchenkov’s sturdy, but it’ll be a cruel spring in Ottawa.
12. Florida Panthers
Bouwmeester’s gone, and what’s left? Well, David Booth is still nasty, and Nathan Horton is the best Horton since Timmy, and I like Bryan McCabe and Thomas Vokoun ok, but this isn’t a playoff team. Eight straight years of misses… I don’t see it changing, as entertaining as their late season push last year was.
13. Tampa Bay Lightning
Some folks like the Lightning to make a push, but I’m not sold yet. Young Stamkos will be stronger, and St. Louis and Lecavelier are still a pair of stars, fair enough. The D is improved, too, with rook Vic Hedman coming in to the league right away, and Mattias Ohlund arriving from Vancouver. So maybe. But I’ll believe it when the wins start coming.
14. New York Islanders
John Tavares. There, I said it. Unfortunately, he’s just one dude, one very young but talented dude, and this team still has a lot of suck stuck in it. I kinda feel bad for Marty Biron… hell of a demotion, though definitely deserved. At least the Isles didn’t move to Kansas City, right?
15. Atlanta Thrashers
I hate watching games played in Atlanta, because the local ads always talk about “BLUELAND,” the contrived name for the arena. But when they cut to the stands, it’s only half-full. Also: worst jerseys in the league?
—–
WESTERN CONFERENCE
1. San Jose Sharks
The Sharks will repeat as conference champs. 117 points last year and the President’s Trophy makes that a safe pick, but I think the team is reloaded and ready to finally advance deep into the playoffs. Heatley goes west, and I think it’s gonna be big for San Jose. Pairing him with Thornton and Setoguchi instantly creates one of the premier lines in the league. What I like about the Sharks – besides the offense and goaltending – is the special teams, close to the top on both the PK and the PP. They’re too good not to finally shake the curse one of these years, and when they do, look out. If I was an Anaheim fan, though, I’d still be clowning them.
2. Calgary Flames
There’s few sights in hockey more exhilirating than the Saddledome decked out in red in April, and even though the Flames haven’t got out of the first round since their Cup run in 2004, there’s reason for hope: namely, the defense. Darryl Sutter locked up Bouwmeester, Phaneuf, Regehr and Sarich are solid as any top four in the league, and if Miika Kiprusoff picks it back up, opposing teams will be gasping for scoring chances. Can’t forget about Jokinen. If they get some offense – and I think they will, even though they lost Cammalleri – the Flames will kick some ass.
3. Chicago Blackhawks
I could spend these sentences ragging on punk-ass Patrick Kane, but I’ll save that for another post. The Hawks came of age last year, and yeah, I like them to beat out Detroit for the Central this go-round. Besides Kane, Chicago snatched up mercenary Marian Hossa, and I’m a big Patrick Sharp fan. And goddamn, almost forgot about Jonathan Toews. No question, the Hawks will score. Defense is steady, too: Duncan Keith, Brent Seabrook, overrated Brian Campbell. Huet is up and down, and he’ll need to hang in there for my gaudy prediction to be proven correct, but I like the Hawks to follow-up with a statement year and challenge for the conference crown. Too much talent not to. Oh yeah: they open in Finland tomorrow night against Florida, which is kinda cool. I lived in Helsinki for a year when I was a kid. I love Finland.
4. Detroit Red Wings
I’m sick of the damn Red Wings – all that winning’s got me hating real bad – but they’re back, and you can’t really fuck with em too hard. They know how to win. You know the names: Datsyuk, Zetterberg, Kronwall, Lidstrom. Of course. All back and ready to continue dominating, sure. But sooner or later these dudes are gonna start to fade, and while I know this isn’t scientific, I think this is the year the wheels fall off. I think they’ll actually miss Hossa, Hudler and Samuelsson some, and I think Osgood is old, and I think Howard is real young. I know this is a crazy pick but I got a bad feeling about the Wings this year.
5. Vancouver Canucks
Scrappy-ass Canucks locked up their alien twins for 5 mil each. So Kang and Kodos are back in the fold, and Luongo reupped for a million years, and here comes Samuelsson coming in from Detroit, and Schneider from MTL, and the Olympics are showing up in February. That’s a bunch of good stuff happening, and I look to Vancouver to step it up this year. I like Vancouver’s D a lot, especially young Alex Edler, who showed up out of nowhere to notch 10 goals from the blueline. It’s easy to overlook Vancouver in the top-heavy West, but they’re dangerous.
6. Anaheim Ducks
The Ducks soldier on. They took some hits on defense, dealing Pronger and watching Beauchemin walk for Toronto, but they’ve still got Niedermayer and Wisniewski and oh yeah, the top goalie duo in hockey. Oh yeah, and they picked up 19-year-old Luca Sbisa in that Pronger deal, and he’s got a bright future after making the cut to stay with the big club for the start of the year. I like the Ducks because they always kinda fly under the radar a little, but they stay solid. Another trip to the playoffs for these dudes.
7. St. Louis Blues
I loved watching the Blues bash their way to the playoffs last year, turning it on heavy when it counted and coming out of the blue to lock up the sixth spot in the West. Fun team to watch, and although the Canucks knocked em out in the first, it was a wild ride. According to the team, the fans are on notice: the Blues have nearly doubled their season ticket sales from last year. Bitchin. The rough thing for Kariya, Boyes, Mason et al. is the fact that they’re in the Central with Chicago and Detroit. Regardless, I think they squeak in again.
8. Columbus Blue Jackets
I like what Columbus is doing: building around a tough rookie goalie in Steve Mason. If they can get some offense going with the return of Derick Brassard from injury and good years out of Vermette, Huselius, and Umberger, I think Hitchcock’s crew earns another year of playoff experience. Slowly but surely in Ohio.
9. Edmonton Oilers
Khabibulin arrives in Edmonton, but it won’t be enough to push the Oilers in. Not enough scoring, too thin on offense. I don’t like Pat Quinn, but he’s probably an upgrade over Craig MacTavish. They’re kinda young, so we’ll chalk 09-10 up to a learning experience.
10. Dallas Stars
Turco’s done, in my book, and while some observers peg the Stars for the playoffs this year, I’m not one of them. Sure, the return of Richards and Morrow up front is big, and Mike Ribiero is a consistent producer. And yeah, not having to deal with Avery will help. But even now that they’re healthy, I don’t think they have the defense to run Marc Crawford’s offense-first system.
11. Los Angeles Kings
I really like Ryan Smyth in LA. This is a young team and he’s a vet and all those cliches about leadership will prove true in this situation. Jonathan Quick is on his way up, I think, after winning the starting job in net last year over a motley crew of scrubs. Dustin Brown’s a talent, too. I like the Kings – hell, maybe I’ve got them too low here.
12. Minnesota Wild
Niklas Backstrom is the man. After that, it’s kinda dicey in Minnesota. Havlat and Sykora should help, but this is a transition year with a new coach and a new GM in Richards and Fletcher. Quiet season ahead.
13. Nashville Predators
Shea Weber and Pekka Rinne can’t do it alone. A boring offseason that didn’t address any of the holes on offense means Nashville sinks some this year. Things are getting tight in Music City.
14. Phoenix Coyotes
At least they’re still in Phoenix, right? Right? I can’t imagine how these players feel after the crazy offseason they’ve had. Just last night, word came that the bankruptcy judge has rejected both Balsillie and the league’s bids. Long story short, they’re in Phoenix for another year, but it’s a mess. Sorry, Hamilton, but I don’t know if you wanted these guys anyways. On the ice, Shane Doan is about all this team has going for it after Jokinen’s departure. Bryzgalov’s decent, but this is a ragged bunch.
15. Colorado Avalanche
Rebuilding. Sorry, Avs fans, I’m fuckin beat. This was a lot of words to tap out. How about this: You’ll get a nice shiny pick in next year’s draft, and you’ll win the cup in 2018. Cool?
GAME ON!
October 1st, 2009 at 7:45 pm
Good round up I got center ice and tickets to opening day sharks! Are any more custom NHL caps going to come out?
October 1st, 2009 at 8:12 pm
Thanks for the write up dude. Although me being the [spoiled] homer I am, I don’t think the Wings are going anywhere. People have been saying the same shit about them being old and this being the year they fall off for 12-14 years. Now they’re pissed off and will actually play some defense. Their top 6 can’t be beat topped by ANYBODY.
LET’S DROP THE PUCK.
October 1st, 2009 at 8:23 pm
….aaaand Ovechkin’s got his first.
October 1st, 2009 at 10:18 pm
I’m a big fan of Ovechkin. I just prefer he doesn’t score two goals against the Bruins while I’m there attending opening night.
FUCK.
Seriously though, dude’s a beast.
October 2nd, 2009 at 9:51 am
Hahaha yeah Mike you’re right, the whole league and many a prognosticator has been praying and praying for the Wings downfall for years now, and it has yet to happen. Also if anything you should take comfort in my picking em 4th because while I have a bad feeling about the Wings, I also have a bad feeling about the accuracy of my predictions. Bookmark this now and come back here in April and talk shit.
October 2nd, 2009 at 10:41 am
The habs are making the playoffs over buffalo and toronto.
October 2nd, 2009 at 12:24 pm
They’ll have to get a big chunk of those playoff points without Markov, then – he’s out 3-4 months with a torn tendon. http://tsn.ca/nhl/story/?id=293425
October 2nd, 2009 at 12:31 pm
Fantastic news for my Fantasy team
October 2nd, 2009 at 6:07 pm
This was indeed a lot of words, took me all day (because I have to work) but I read it all. Could you throw some of your crazy-talented writing skills towards baseball? Or perhaps basketball (college) come March? I grew up in Michigan, so the Wings are a must in my world, so don’t hate too hard. I’m still reeling from my Braves doing what they’ve been doing the past 4 years, they waste 140 games (or so) and then make a run in the last 22, but fall short by 2 or 3 games in the NL wild card. I’ll be pulling for the Tigers now. But with my luck lately that will be their downfall. As always, I pull for Buffalo. I’m pretty excited that you’re writing about sports regularly, I’m not gonna lie.
October 3rd, 2009 at 9:41 pm
Yeah I wrote that before Markov went down. Huge, huge, huge hit. Hurts Russia’s Olympic chances pretty bad too.
MTL – BUF game has been pretty shitty. Hopefully we can pull this out.
October 6th, 2009 at 4:44 pm
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November 10th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
Jesus, this is gonna hurt me come April. You can already tell. Leafs and Canes? Ouch. I was high.
November 21st, 2009 at 12:19 pm
islanders moving up!!
January 30th, 2010 at 6:07 pm
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April 14th, 2010 at 6:08 pm
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