Dennis Chow‘s art garbage was on display at 350 Broadway so I went and looked at it in an effort for the harsh words I’d said about it previously on the blog. I said it was visual dogshit, like dogshit smeared into your eyeballs. I had to atone for those comments and so I showed up. The crowd was okay, it wasn’t quite as packed and hornedout as Ellen Stagg’s calendar party but it was still good.

This is Dennis Chow AKA Glamnation whose show it was. I kinda feel like he’s my sibling even though I’m not Asian and he’s older and married.

Dennis has a goofy smile. Here’s a whole bunch of images of Dennis’s art. They’re kinda like animation cells of cartoons that I wish existed.

These are all pretty good and he’s selling them for $75 a piece. Don’t be a douche, buy them all!

I got to meet Dennis’s wife but what was even better was spending time with My Pal the Crook’s wife. Like a message board commenter once said, horizontal stripes make boobs look big and jail-breaky.

Lamour Supreme‘s a really horny guy. He’s taking his dick out in this photo. All women should be on the lookout for this guy. He’s a menace. He even smiles like Mike Tyson. He kept helping himself to hefty handfuls of Goldfish crackers which he had stashed in his pocket and there were pieces of lint mixed in with the fishes. I read on some toy message board that he’s addicted to gambling.

That’s Ryan Keely on my right and Ellen Stagg on my right. These are some super beautiful women. They kinda look like they belong in fantasy art, riding dragons.

“Bitch, why are you not riding a dragon!?”, I yelled curiously at Ryan. Ellen watched on and reverted back to being a juvenile delinquent.

I brought up how gross Taco Bell is, referencing the Baja Blast flavor of Mountain Dew and the black taco. Ryan had this carefully explained thesis about how the individual food items of Taco Bell are best combined for ultimate deliciousness. Then we talked about comic books. This was a crucial conversation.

Also Ryan was the Penthouse Pet of the month from October 2009. When she showed me the white gold necklace they gave her that only the centerfolds get I considered snatching it and dashing. Rationality took over about five seconds later when I realized that the Mishka guys know my social security number and this action would mean starting life anew as a Golem like hobo, constantly stroking “my precious.” Also it woulda upset Ryan I assume. Fucking, conscious and foresight. Life would be more like a movie if I had no soul.

Want…that…necklace…soo..ooooooo…baddddddddddd….. I was growing green with covetessness and had to jet before it was a time of crimes.

Vice just released this new book with my drawing on the final page. They had a little release party at Fuse Gallery within Lit so I was there. I drew pictures of monsters, them and pretty girls inside people’s copies of the book. I drew one guy with a monster’s body and a pretty girl’s severed head which had a devilock and was smoking a cigarette.

On the left is Vice’s Editor-in-Chief, Jesse Pearson. He told me that when he was fourteen that he was in a band called CBTB which stood for the Cliff Burton Tribute Band. That guy on the right is Jake. I’ve been seeing him around for the past seven years. He was, or maybe still is, a model and all the punks knew him as “the model” and I’ve heard photo people refer to him as “Punk Rock Jake.” Caught between two worlds!

The party was so fun and relaxed that the Crypt Keeper and the Vault Keeper came out to see what was up.

This is Fumie Ishii, the photographer. She’s got an amazing smile. When I still had the giant beard she photographed me for her beard series.

Standing next to Fumie is Maggie Lee who is a photographer and zinester who works at the aNYthing’s gangstore and lives near me. She is also good photographer and an equally good model.

We started playing with our cameras and trying to make good photos. I put Fumie’s beret over my fitted for a real golf course look.

“The Grudge.”

“Put your hands where my eyes can’t see.”

I ended up pulling on this girl’s hair. She reminds me of how I remembered girls looking when I was twelve and they were thirteen, It’s probably the pale skin combined with the lipstick and the hat. Reminds me of hugging the eighth grade girls while I waited for the bus.

The Vice crew had a last supper of Hennessy wings from Dallas BBQ. The women in the foreground weren’t really party to that, they were just there. Vicers are solid loners.

Later losers.