
I am almost positive that you are rolling your eyes at me. Already.
Do you see what I did there? I had every opportunity to say “I am almost positive that you are rolling your eyes at me, New York native and/or inhabitant.” But I didn’t. Because it’s cool to hate Friends, whether you’re in NYC or not. But those in the city that I’ve met and had this discussion with REALLY hate Friends (‘You know, I just think Seinfeld presents a much more realistic milieu’) and I sort of wanted to single them out, but I’d hate to leave you, Mister or Missus Midwestern/Southern/West Coast person, out in the cold. You can all hate this show, and as such, you are all allowed to roll your eyes at me for loving it. Because I love it.
This is also the part of the post where I try to wax philosophical and embed the lesson or hidden meaning…that being that I wonder if NY people hate FRIENDS in the same way/for the same reasons that California people hate shows like the O.C. or shit like that, but, well, it’s sort of thin, and so I’ll skip it.
And so here are my top 5 FRIENDS episodes. Don’t even hate. (Apologies, too, for the non-embedded movies. Please click through. It seems that WB has no issues with folks chopping and screwing FRIENDS [I looked for witchy ways to spell friends but I have no idea how to type that way. -Ed] episodes, but heaven forbid someone drop them into their blog. Click the titles of each, except where noted.)

1) The One With the Trivia Game (Season 4, Episode 12)
In which: Joey and Chandler fall into dispute with Rachel and Monica over who knows who better, the guys or the girls. Ross—who is my favorite character in the show, for reasons like this—volunteers to facilitate a trivia game contest to settle the matter, the winner of which getting the girls’ apartment (which is very nice, and as such a HUGE bone of contention for FRIENDS haters) as the purse.
Why I love it: Aside from it’s being hilarious, it is a perfect example of how, by this time (Season 4) these characters are not exactly the trite, flat morons that haters hate. They are deep, round, and full of nooks and crannies. Yes. There are things about them that get under your skin, but—Ross and Monica especially—one really gains a sense of how damaged these people are.
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2) The One With the Nap Partners (Season 7, Episode 6)
In which: there is a main plot to this episode, but I can’t remember what it is. The important part is that, in a totally non-gay way, Ross and Joey are perchance to accidentally sleeping together on the couch. Joey enjoys his nap with Ross so much, that he spends the rest of the episode trying to get him to do it again…this time on purpose. Hilarity ensues.
Why I love it: This is both bad and good humor. I get that. The delicacy with which this issue is treated, however…well. Maybe not delicacy. It’s just such fertile ground for churning out a bunch of gay jokes and it never goes there. It’s…sweet, sort of.

3) The One With Ross’ Sandwich (Season 5, Episode 9)
In which: Ross is coming off a hard few weeks. After a divorce and an eviction, one of the only good things he’s got going for him is an epic ‘Thanksgiving leftovers’ sandwich that gets eaten out of the fridge at work. He does not take it well.
Why I love it: First, ‘the moist maker’. Enter, again, my very valid, very subtle argument that no, these are not flat characters. Also take special note of what I call the Schwimmer Effect in which a totally capable and high-minded actor like David Schwimmer consistently and actively plays the fool for zillions of dollars per minute and then goes on to be, like, the real deal once his first show is over.

4) The One Where Rachel Has a Baby, pt. 1 (Season 8, Episode 23)
(Can’t find a good clip for this one…which makes sense, since the part I love is, like, totally obscure.)
In which: Rachel is having her baby. Monica and Chander are arriving at the hospital and are bringing flowers to Rachel’s room. They burst into a delivery room in which a woman is screaming to ‘get this kid out of me’ and it’s, like, the same delivery scene that’s ever been on any show, ever. Monica and Chandler back away, white as sheets, and before things cut away, Chandler earns his keep with one of my favorite jokes of all time..one that I use inappropriately frequently: “I think that kid was wearing a shirt!”
Why I love it: That joke, mostly. Which says alot, seeing as though, while a fan of Ross, I am not a fan of Ross and Rachel. I totally think Mona was way hotter.
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5) The One With the Baby Shower (Season 8, Episode 20)
In which: Joey is auditioning for a television gameshow called Bamboozled. Bamboozled is full of super weird, super crazy rules, and the three guys play a mock version of it to help him practice.
Why I love it: ONLY for the Bamboozled part. I don’t care about the baby shower or whatever. The rules for this game remind me of having my friends in the sixth grade try to describe how D&D works. I think it’s absolutely hilarious.
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Bonus: The One Where Chandler Doesn’t Like Dogs (Season 7, Episode 8)
Love it or hate it, the FRIENDS writing staff maintained a tradition of capturing super-small, teeny-tiny idiosyncracies that everybody has experienced at some point or another…even a moo one. My wife and I have an ongoing battle over her insistence that it is ‘All The Sudden’ and I have borne witness to heated conversations dedicated solely to the validity of, ahem, ‘Supposebly.”
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Double Bonus: The One On the Last Night (Season 6, Episode 6)
Bonus because this is also a game-themed item and I already have two of those above….Chandler wants to give Joey money, but Joey has too much pride to just take it. After a few abortive attempts, Chandler invents a hack card game called ‘Cups’ which he uses as cause for losing thousands of dollars to Joey, who badly needs the money. Joey then proceeds to lose the money to Ross at ‘Cups’ and Ross doesn’t believe that Chandler made it all up as a charity ploy. Hilarity ensues. I love this, plain and simple.
I have watched all 10 seasons of FRIENDS at least two-dozen times over the past 7 years. I don’t THINK that one needs to make that much of an investment for this stuff to grow on them, but, well, maybe that’s the case. Either way, these are my top 5 favorite episodes of Friends. Thanks for playing.