You’ll never guess who was in the new issue of Acclaim Magazine! Me! Me was in Acclaim Magazine. You’ll probably also be surprised to hear that there’s a thing called Acclaim Magazine! But you’d probably be surprised to hear about any magazine! Some still exist and this is one of them!
This one, Acclaim, is made in Australia for an Australian audience so it’s mostly pictures! (Take that, Australians! Zing!) My pal Ryan Keely was on the cover some time about a year ago so it was cool that I could be in the magazine too, and I didn’t even have to be a sexy lady! Although you are more than welcome to jerk off to me!
I’m not the only guy from Мишка in the mag. Greg “Kills Competition” Mishka is in here too. His portrait was taken by our guy, Lamour Supreme. When Lamour saw this he kept going,”Wowwwww. I’m a photographer now!” The article on Greg details some of the best crap in his treasure heap.
Then there’s a fashion spread of sexy youngsters wearing cool clothes including the Fuck Punk shirt that I illustrated. I wasn’t on the cover or in Greg’s interview but the thing I drew was in this photoshoot that’s meant to look like a sexy fun party. It’s almost like I’m at the sexy party because my shirt’s there except that I wouldn’t fit in at that party at all because I’d get bored and hate their music.
“Hey kids, what’s this crap you’re listening to? Arcade Fire!? Fuck that shit. Here listen to some “Wytch Hauz,” that’s where it’s at. Do you know who is dead? Bela Lugosi, that’s who.” If you want to buy my super cool T-shirt and be a sexy teen that I hate then buy it from us over here.
There”s some more sexy teens (makin’ me so mad n’ horny) wearing Мишка clothes but none of them are mine so I could care less. I can’t beat off to girls who are not wearing clothes that I made. It is my gift. It is my curse. You can buy this shirt here if you want. I don’t care though.
It’s kinda odd that the New York issue is so focused on us. New York isn’t T-shirts or artists…It’s buildings and land! It’s tunnels and prisons and containers that seperate humans from each other! It’s pain and human waste, and about a million-billion cockroaches. Imagine a homeless man’s turd doing some sort of swing dance with a cockroach whore. That’s what New York is to me.
On the final page is the interview that some Australian did with me. It’s called Pretty Girls and Monsters since that’s most of what I draw. In this very revealing interview I bared some personal information and finally discuss how I met Greg Мишка at Safe Harbor. I also talk about some other stuff. I forget.
You can buy that art that they used from Мишка right here, for a mere four-hundo. So that’s my news. We were slathered all over an Australian lifestyle magazine like poisonous bugs are slathered over that accursed continent.- Toilet Cobra