• I Heart LA T-Shirt ($32.00)

Sibling rivalries can get so messy, can’t they? Cain and Abel, may your blaspheming legacy one day lift its heavy burden from the genetically similar backs of bros and sis’ the world over. We have that new store in LA (say it with me now: 128 South La Brea!), and we heard that it was getting pretty jealous of misser tree fiddy. We couldn’t quite figure out where this verdant envy was coming from, until we realized it was probably for our Eye Heart NY t-shirt.

So, in the interest of fairness and dopeness, we cooked up an Angeleno version of that excellent t-shirt, and once again everything is good in the world. The two stores hashed the whole thing out over some beers. When stores drink, they have to drink out of giant trashcans. Their napkins are a giant towel. LOL. So let everyone know how much you love Los Angeles in the most body horror way possible with this I Heart LA Shirt, available online and in the La Brea store.

Мишка LA
128 S. La Brea
Los Angeles, CA
212-536-4234

Now this is what breaking bad really sounds like. This afternoon, we’re super excited to be premiering a brand new track from Mushy entitled “Crystal Chemistry”. For quite some time, and especially after the release of her astounding LP Faded Heart early in 2011, Italy’s Valentina Mushy has captured our hearts as one of the best darkwave artists working today. Bringing gothic sounds back to a place of ingenuity, Mushy makes hypnotic music perfect for a rainy day like today.

Mushy has a 7” release coming out on Haute Magie later this year, and “Crystal Chemistry” is the B-side from that release. It definitely shows a new side to Mushy, eschewing any vocals beyond some deeply buried drawls, and showcasing an epic build complete with thrumming war drums. With it’s twisting, elliptical structure, you’ll have no trouble keeping “Crystal Chemistry” on repeat all day. The release, out on October 27th, is blood red vinyl, with double sided foldover jackets featuring artwork by Valentina. There’s also a vellum slipcover limited art print edition (first 50, only available from the label) with art also by Valentina.

Confession time: I missed last week’s article for three incredibly valid reasons.

1. Borderlands 2
2. A stealth hangover (seriously did not see the bastard coming)
3. Hernia

OK, I possibly invented the third one, but still one and two are still pretty solid. Now, do you see the validity? Absorb it. Forgive me and then let’s move on. I’m about to hit you with such an incredibly powerful fistful of gaming news and titillation that you’ll wish I’d finally eaten myself into that early grave.

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Tetsuya Mizuguchi stepping back from game design

Tetsuya Mizuguchi, a man responsible for two of my favourite games in Rez and Lumines, has decided to take a step back from game development, instead opting for a more spokesman-like role over at Q Entertainment.

“Q Entertainment director Nobuhiko Shimizu dropped the news to Eurogamer, stating, “right now Mizuguchi does not produce the games.” Apparently he is focusing more on academic work”

Why can’t these game creators be never-ceasing super-machines; capable of endlessly producing games that inspire and capture the imagination without ever having to rest? Is that so much to ask? This is a sad loss for the game development community and one that I hope isn’t permanent. Rez in particular, shattered my mind as a twelve-year-old and the impact it had has forever changed my perspective on the medium’s potential for immersion and sensation. Farewell, Miziguchi-san, come back soon.

—–

SEGA supports the Reptile Agenda

David Icke is a baffling, often offensive, yet thoroughly interesting man who’s views amuse and bemuse in equal measure. You know the ones I mean; about the reptilian race integrating themselves into human governments and his claim that he is the son of the Godhead. As it goes, I’m in no position to prove him wrong and, unlike most political figures, I’m actually interested in what he has to say, although I’m not sure about his whole thing about Jewish people controlling the moon and the media. Oh, I think he may claim that they too are members of the reptilian Illuminati. Yeah, that one’s going a bit too far.

For whichever reason (pick one) SEGA aren’t cool with David Icke and his concerns over the reptilian agenda; blocking him when he planned to use a song featured in SEGA’s Medieval 2: Total War.

“Icke planned to use the song “We Are All One” by Angela and Jeff van Dyck in an upcoming anti-war talk at Wembley, London. Sega, who owns the rights to the song, blocked him from doing so.”

He responded with:

“So it is fine and non-controversial for them to use war as entertainment for the young and others, with all the potential impact on their minds and perceptions about war and violence, but not okay to use a song to which they own the rights to call for people to stop killing each other in crazy wars,” you wrote. “That would never do because I am a ‘controversial figure’. Tut, tut.”

I can see why SEGA would want to totally disassociate themselves from Icke, but it’s probably worth considering that five minutes on DeviantArt reveals more Sonic the Hedgehog yaoi than any human is prepared to handle: an altogether far more brand-damaging association in my opinion. Suddenly Icke seems like a palatable spokesman.

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Borderlands 2 bug diminishes your badassery

As I think I’ve already made quite clear: Borderlands 2 has been eating up a fair bit of my free time lately. As such, I would be mortified; heartbroken; suicidal, even, if something were to happen to my character progress. Myself and Owen Money (that’s my Assassin’s moniker) have gone through some tough times together: we’ve seen things, man. If the game suddenly decided to crap on us in an almighty fashion, then I don’t think I’d be able to look it at ever again. Sort of like how you would feel after your once-adoring wife decides you’re ‘not exciting enough’ and cheats on you with your son’s handsome math teacher. Knowing this, it’s fair to say that the news of a game-destroying bug has me on edge at the moment.

The bug erases Badass Ranks, Golden Keys, avatar mods and challenges, not even allowing players to re-attempt them. If a rank challenge gets wiped, it’s apparently gone forever. Although news has spread panic online and is currently responsible for a Gearbox Forum thread boasting over 300 responses, Gearbox themselves are keen to stress that the problem is still a “fairly rare” occurrence.

Let’s hope it stays that way, because I don’t want to meet the man who fucks with my Level 19 Assassin, you feel me?

—–

Blowing on NES cartridges does more harm than good

C’mon Universe, you have to be kidding me: why would you even say such a thing? Apparently, blowing on NES cartridges damages them, as opposed to fixing them: ignoring years of home-fixes that actually prove blowing’s healing power to be an undeniable fact. Some guy, who I won’t name, because they’re obviously an attention-seeking whore, recently put forward a pretty-convincing argument that we are all the architects of our own downfall: at least where our NES games are concerned.

Sure, all this L’Oreal-grade science stuff sounds impressive, but you have to ask yourself what kind of smart-arse would investigate such a fact and unleash their findings online; shattering the childhoods of millions in the process. I’ll tell you: it’s the same kind of prick that corrects people at weddings by telling them that unless it’s from the Champagne region then it’s simply sparkling white wine. Let’s just all ignore it, shall we?

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Level-5 would love do adapt Miyazaki’s Laputa. Do it.

The team behind the Professor Layton franchise and the up-coming Studio Ghibli RPG, Ni NO Kuni, has made public their desire to adapt Hayao Miyazaki’s animated masterpiece Castle In The Sky. I have simply this to say: do it. I don’t particularly care how or why, just give me the opportunity to be a Miyazaki Air Pirate and explore that world.

“Concerning exactly what sort of project he’d like to pursue, we asked if Level 5 has had any discussions about adapting existing Studio Ghibli properties into video games. Hino said that he would love to but, naturally, Ghibli would have to approve any such projects. Corporate approvals aren’t a very entertaining topic of conversation though, so we just went ahead and asked which Studio Ghibli film he would like to adapt. Given the opportunity, he said, he would adapt Castle in the Sky. “

Do it.

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NBA Live gets cancelled. Jay Z chuckles

EA Sports’ yearly update behemoth has been little more than a formidable, and largely reliable, force over the past decade or two. Fans of sports games can always rely that the next installment is just around the corner and that it’ll no doubt come with a plethora of new updates to keep them playing for the following twelve months. However, things aren’t quite as reliable for basketball game fans, with EA pulling the plug their iteration of NBA Live for the second time in three years. The decision, most likely wasn’t an easy one, as Andrew Wilson, Executive Vice President of EA SPORTS explains:

“I’m disappointed that we have not yet met our high expectations with NBA Live, but I remain motivated about where we’re going. We’re committed to delivering new innovation in online, and our progress in the visual presentation of the game continues to take big strides. We also know that a great game starts with great gameplay, and this remains a huge priority for us.

This wasn’t an easy decision, but it’s the right one for our fans. I hope you’ll agree when you’re able to play the game next year.”

Ah well, at least there’s still the Jay Z-produced NBA 2K13, which is on shelves Tuesday. I bet he’s loving this.

Usually, in this outro segment, I like to tell you all what I plan to do on completing this task. Really, I should go and get coffee: I’ve run out and I’m crashing pretty hard, but the lack of caffeine has made me cranky and I’m worried I’ll kill if I leave the house and am forced to deal with the public. Whatever will I do? Watch this space..

Hey folks, here’s a video clip of VladTV deeply misunderstanding what makes Riff Raff – and especially interviews with Riff Raff – interesting and entertaining! Instead of just letting him ramble on in his beautiful lilting prose, weaving tales of panda soup and potential Vanderbilt stardom, this interviewer decides to go ahead and quiz him about semantic ethics in rap music, namely the decidedly caucasian V-Nasty’s use of the n-word.

While he should have just clapped the reviewer up for asking such an un-fun question, he instead starts employing every last ounce of his Highroller wiles to try to twist it into something resembling entertainment. It does not go very well, but kudos to Riff for arriving at something like a treatise on the miracle of speech (?). Also his quiet “Jody Highroller” that he slips in at the end.

Metaphorical pizza, of course. Well, I guess not of course. It very well could have been real life, ooey gooey ‘za. ShowYouSuck is a nice dude, maybe he bought his own food truck and traveled the nation, handing out free slices to the kids. Pepperoni? Sure. Sausage? You betcha. Hawaiian? Get that wack shit out of here son, what do you think this is, a state made up of several small islands? But no, this time it was metaphorical – or at least musical pizza.

Here’s the second video from Show’s Summer Tour series, and this one catches him in our beautiful home city of New York. There’s some cameos from Mishka folks like my deskmate Michael Cohn, and also the Keep Watch eyeball helmet/headgear thingy from 350 Broadway. Stick around for the end of the clip, which just turns into a good old fashioned music video. Multitasking.

Good day femme fatales and gents. I gathered the courage to purchase spinach & artichoke hummus after making a long hard decision at Target. I stood there deciding which variation of hummus I would ultimately take home, afraid of not enjoying or appreciating the one I may choose. This is the kind of tough choice making I go through on a daily basis. As you can see, it’s what keeps me a grounded and eternally youthful and beautiful young man. This very same style of decision making is intertwined with watching UFC pay per views.

If your bank account is anything like mine, it’s more than likely the same situation for you as well. In my case, it involves breaking the Badman Shark’s heart, and not bro’ing out at his American Psycho styled pad. Luckily Dana White understands this type of thing. It’s as if his soul is connected to mine. So the UFC does free fight cards on occasion, and tomorrow is UFC on Fuel 5IVE. It’s really 5 but 5IVE looks stylish.

The always exciting, and often very tall, Stefan Struve makes his return to the Octagon against the undefeated Stipe Miocic. With Struve’s 16 submission wins and Miocic’s 7 KO’s, we’re bound to see one of two things.

Struve will be laid out, wide eye’d, staring at the ceilining, or Miocic will be helped out of the cage with a limb hanging from where it’s normally situated and well functioned.

Co main eventing (yes, eventing) is Dan Hardy against Amir ‘Forrest Griffin Jr.’ Sadollah. Sadollah looks, acts, talks and fights like Griffin, so I gave him that nickname. I’m convinced it’s some sort of Solid Snake – Big Boss thing going on.. Hardy is coming off of a KO win over the vicious Duane Ludwig, and Amir is also fighting from off of a win over Jorge Lopez. No, not George Lopez, but Jorge Lopez.

That’s sort of like Jerry Sandusky and Gerry Sandusky. That’s actually exactly the same.

Akira Corassani makes his UFC debut tomorrow against another TUF alumni, 9-1 Andy Ogle. You may recall Akira from TUF: Team Bisping vs. Team Mayhem. He’s a tenacious fighter and his debut will be streamed via Facebook tomorrow.

My instructor from Williamsburg MMA, Roger Mamedov will also be cornering him tomorrow, so look out for that! The 5 preliminary fights will be streamed via Facebook and the 6 main card fights will all air live on FUEL TV. Be sure to pick up some Dr. Peppers and enjoy this one.

Miguel – Kaleidoscope Dream (2012) [RCA] // Grade: A-

We’re in the middle of a creative boom for R&B. It’s an explosion of talent that we haven’t seen since the early nineties brought us a slew of oiled up dude dudes that looked like NFL wide receivers (crooning about making strong but sensitive love to chicks), and a myriad of girl groups comprised of the prettiest jawns from your local pool singing thinly veiled songs about fellatio. In the context of 90s R&B Bill Clinton’s presidency makes so much more sense. While the 90s saw R&B really find itself post Michael Jackson, making pop songs that weren’t afraid to (openly) talk about fucking, the work we’re seeing today is more diverse. Make no mistake it’s still about sex and love, it’s just coming from people who look and sound different. To wildly simplify, on one end of the spectrum you’ve got a dude like The-Dream carrying the torch for more traditional 80s/90s styled R&B (with an overtly hood spin) and on the other of the spectrum you’ve got dudes like How To Dress Well who make oddly compelling outer realm fuck jams, for all the weird cats that work in the keyboard section of your local Guitar Center.

Long ago, (2006?), philosophers/muses/gems of the NYC public education system/rappers DMX and Dipset asked the question “what’s really good?” In the R&B game, it’s gotta be the heads making songs that sit comfortably between Mary J. Blige’s ongoing musical Tales of Woe: Live from the Beauty Salon and the lil homey Frank Ocean’s nine minute long freak out psych jams about strippers, bi-sexuality, and aliens. Miguel’s Kaleiodoscope Dream is that album.

In press photos Miguel alternatingly looks like a generic R&B cat and a dude that was late to an audition for a touring version of an ethnic Grease. Somehow these divergent press photos summarize his musical output. Songs like “Adorn” and “Don’t Look Back” sound like they come from the dude wearing a hoodie in his press photo and giving heavy bedroom eyes. They’re radio hits in the waiting, not quite fast enough for primetime club play, but perfect for a chick named Renée to bump at her desk—as long as it’s at a reasonable volume. Given a week’s rotation these are songs that easily seep into your subconscious, becoming ingrained in the yet to be isolated part of the brain that is responsible for creating “my jam” level adoration. While either of these songs could appear on Hot 97, they both have odd affectations buried in them betray Miguel’s wider range of influences, especially the Radiohead esque vocal line of “Don’t Look Back” and the El DeBarge falsetto of “Adorn.”

When Miguel rocks a high pompadour, wayfarers, and leather jacket in photos he looks like the type of dude that would make a song like “Kaleidoscope Dream.” It’s a four minute song that sounds like it should be about 6 or 7 minutes long. The verse samples Labi Siffre’s “I Got The…” (better known as the skeleton of Eminem’s “My Name Is”) for a thumping bass that Miguel floats over in falsetto and reverb. By the time you get to the bridge and chorus, the song transforms into a sparse delay and electric guitar affair that feels like The Bends era Radiohead, The Wall era Pink Floyd or Ladies and Gentleman We’re Floating in Space era Spiritualized—depending on how nerdy you want to get with your weightlessness inducing musical interludes. The point here is, most R&B cats are not invoking your favorite liberal arts student’s favorite band and my disco loving gay uncle’s favorite hangover music in the same song. Let alone making that shit work. Very rare feat there.

The rest of the album plays out in similar fashion between songs that will relegate themselves to your newfound jams and songs that sound like ballads from a lost Prince side project where dude got way into that period in funk history when everyone was wearing space costumes. What really works on Kaleidoscope Dream is that none of these songs sound at opposition with each other, even though they should on paper. There’s no way a bare electric guitar and vocal song called “Pussy is Mine” should sound like anything other than a simultaneous parody of John Mayer and R.Kelly’s careers. Yet, the shit is actually an affecting and moving ballad about wanting to feel special in a relationship, and less explicitly stated—beating up the pussy. That is the magic world of Kaleidoscope Dream, a place where Radiohead, Labi Siffre, D’Angelo and Tank can have an understated musical conversation about love and sex as channeled through Miguel.

What is this, a new episode of Yo Gabba Gabba!? Mater Suspiria Vision is for the kids, don’tcha know? All the youths need some lessons in chewin’ on knives and affixing metal spikes to their eyelids. Dr. Spock would certainly approve. This is the new video for the Mater Suspiria Vision track “Evil House of Forbidden Fruits (Part 2)” and it’s awesome. Duh.

Prosymna is featured on the track, both musically and in the video, and the inclusion of the strong female vocals make for one of my favorite MSV tracks. Then there’s the video, with it’s satanic Holly Golightly heroine, and also figs. “Evil House of Forbidden Fruits (Part 2)” is part of the “Paracusia/Crack Witch 2″ LP, out now on Phantasma Disques.

Too mean? I’m just kidding Michael Richards, I think we’ve all forgiven you for your outburst six years ago. In retrospect you were clearly just really mad. And also maybe a little bit racist. But hopefully we’ve reached the point where what was one uncomfortable can now just be humorous. Have you watched that video recently? Holy smokes, that’s a wild one there.

Anyway, Michael Richards was just on the season finale of Jerry Seinfeld’s web-series Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee. Though it received a bit of hype before airing, I feel like the series never took off, maybe because it’s not so “funny” necessarily, and is probably better for it. It really takes its time showing people hanging out, not letting their conversations be edited to death. I do believe this is the longest we’ve seen Jerry and Michael together since the Kramer days, and it really is wild to see the incredibly different (and unpredictable) paths they’ve gone down. Michael Richards looks like he’s yet to move past the shell shocked eyes he adopted in 2006. Feel better Cosmo!