There has to be a better post title for this; and probably a better blog category and whatnot. But at the same time, words just fail to capture this thing. This discovery made on Pompano Beach, FL of a goddamn softball-sized eyeball. Does it come from a giant squid? Or some kind of really large fish? No one knows yet, which is funny to me, because if somebody somewhere knew they should have already said something. I kind of want to know, but at the same time, I don’t. I just want to stare into this eyeball and get incepted.

Also: can we hook that eyeball to some kind of contraption that will let us see what it sees? I mean, we can make bionic eyes now, we can make silicon retinas, there has to be a way to find the right nervous frequency that this thing uses. Should we slice it open to figure out what this eyeball has that we don’t? Or should we just keep it as it is, suspended in a vat of fruit juice at an aquarium so kids from all around the world can come in and stare into this eyeball and get incepted?

Or send it to the Will It Blend? guys. That eyeball looks kind of fresh too, I’ve seen fish at the farmer’s market look gloomier. Did the salt water preserve it or something? Do you think the guy who found it got spooked when he picked it up on the beach – thinking it was a funny looking rock, that turns out all gelatinous and HOLY SHIT IT’S LOOKING AT ME. I would have dropped it. Probably. Do eyeballs float? If you click on the picture (or here) you can see more angles (hah!) from the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission’s Flickr page. Stare at this with me, yall. Let’s get incepted.

- Gnou