Today marked a glorious day in the history of education. Not since the destruction of Alexandria’s and Timbuktu’s libraries has so much information been put on display, for those that thirst for knowledge. Professor Gucci Mane or Dr. LaFlare, if you’re not into brevity, lectured junior high school students in Atlanta for career day. His classes were dedicated to discussing what it takes to become a rapper, and other typical career day topics. Discussions of “how one becomes a ‘Freaky Gurl’” were apparently off limits.

Limiting The Gooch to such mundane and pedestrian topics really seems like a waste. Gucci could’ve easily given  several riveting lectures, off the top of my head I’d love to hear him discuss “Burrr: A Survey Of Climate Change Theories”, “Ornithology of East Atlanta”, “BurrRussia, Great Burritan, Guccimerica: The Rise and Fall of Empires in the 20th Century”, “Expert Level Alliteration, Allusion and Analogies”, and “Six Stoves in the House & Everybody Cooking or Home Economics”.

The career day events went smoothly save for one incident when a smaller child  asked “If you were a rapper that fell off, how would you get back on?” The child was revealed to be former Gucci protege OJ Da Juiceman, in a clean Osh Kosh overalls fit.

- raythedestroyer