A Journey to delicious and beyond. FRISKIES wet cat food unlocks a magical world of sensory stimulation for your cat.

Friskies, the gateway drug to “Adventureland”. I wish I could visit Adventureland, frealz.

Some say Planet X is the twelfth planet in our solar system, and a second renaissance of consciousness will overcome humanity when it returns to our orbit. What else is out there? In this new Bloglin segment, we’ll delve into the most provocative theories and findings from the new age. Don’t call them conspiracies…and keep this between us. We don’t want to get tracked down by the New World Order!

Did you know that nobel prize winner, Francis Crick (seen above), was hallucinating on LSD when he discovered the double helix structure of DNA? As he dove further into his studies in genetics, Crick insisted that the complexity of the human DNA strand could NOT have simply developed as environmental happenstance. He subscribed to the theory of Panspermia, in which an intelligent life form in another galaxy ( or perhaps dimension) sent the human DNA strand to our planet in effort to perpetuate (and protect) some type of advanced universal code. An interesting theory when you consider that today’s science community is still unable to comprehend the functions of 95 – 98% of our DNA, labeling it as “Junk”. What exactly is our DNA? How do we tap into understanding its full capability?

DMT crystals

I doubt many of the Bloglin readers require this introduction, but for the sake of posterity, DMT is a psychotropic drug and natural chemical found in our body as well as numerous species of plantlife in the world. It’s believed to induce dream states while we sleep and trigger visuals of bright lights and tunnels during near-death experiences. Certain critical thinkers like Terrence McKenna and Graham Hancock claim it to be the key to transporting us to other dimensions where we can interact with the celestial beings we commonly refer to as aliens (McKenna describes them as Elves). The actual gateway into these other dimensions has been hypothesized to be our pineal gland, which is also suggested (though not yet proven) to be a natural DMT producer within the brain…our Third Eye.

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I was snowboarding in Mammoth over the weekend and decided to get really high and watch The Hurt Locker after we all got back from the mountain. I don’t smoke weed anymore, it gives me anxiety through the roof, but there was a formula at hand that had to do with being shut inside of a condo and not wanting to move because I was so exhausted that fed an urge. Going into it, I knew absolutely nothing about this movie, other than everyone telling me how great it is…So I have to say this after a stoned screening:

HOLY MOLY. There’s The Bridge On The River Kwai, Apocalypse Now, Dr. Strangelove, and The Hurt Locker as far as I’m concerned. It’s one of the greatest war movies I’ve ever seen, and for sure destined to be THE definitive Iraq War film. It makes Three Kings and all the other ones look like Disturbed-scored army commercials. Jeez was this thing intense! Did anyone pick up on how much surrealism Kathryn Bigelow injected into this story? From the 837 bombs scene with Col. Reed to that shot when Jeremy Renner is sitting in his bunk with his bomb helmet on, this movie was pure surrealism in the ways of Kubrick, yet not pastiche at all. Bigelow directed the shit out of that script!

And how about Jeremy Renner being the most bad assed lunatic good guy since Travis Bickle? It’s like he came out of nowhere to remind everyone how to be a real actor. Every line that came out of his character, Lt. James’, mouth was the most macho, “holy-shit did he really just say that?!” dialogue ever! Did you know his breakout role was playing Jeffrey Dahmer? Of course it was!

Man, and the sniper scene? Are you kidding?! When Renner coughs up chunks of his lung and asks for a juice only to nourish Anthony Mackie first? And the cleaning of Ralph Fiennes blood off the ammo magazine…I started to get a heart murmur! The character of Lt. James had so much dimension (and dementia) that it got to a point where I had absolutely no idea who he was. He was a perfectly ambiguous hero. I’m floored.

One more thing…wasn’t it amazing that Bigelow was brave enough to shoot it in black and white? It was gorgeous! Every shot could live as its own epic still photo. How effective was that in placing us into such a bleak, fight or flight environment? I spent the whole movie attempting to analyze why she made such a astonishing choice in cinematography. Then after watching the entire thing, my wife and I realized that the movie wasn’t in black and white, but the RC cables running from the DVD player into the TV were faulty. Wow. Though fomented by stoned disorientation, I’ll say this: Watching The Hurt Locker in black and white was a bizarre, yet seriously profound movie experience that I doubt I’ll ever discover again. The wife and I have to watch it in color (and not stoned) and see if it’s better than in B&W…I’m thinking not.

Ever wonder what your favorite fast food mascots are getting into when they’re not selling you fried chicken and burgers?

Diplo & the crew over at Mad Decent have officially kicked off the 2010 mixtape scene with what I’m sure is going to be one of the year’s best underground releases. Free Gucci: Best of the Cold War Mixtapes is a collection of remixes from Gucci Mane’s Cold War Mixtape series (which I suggest picking up in addition to this if you don’t already have it).

With tracks by Diplo, Salem, Teenwolf and Benzi, just to name a few. Much like the PRGz mix, the production on here spans a range of sounds that shift from ethereal new age (Gucci: “Yo mane, lemme git some of that Enya shit on here.”) to upbeat club bangers and gloomy goth & dubstep. I’ve had this mix on repeat since copping it last week (thanks guys!) and with no hesitation, this mixtape is on par with the best.

Download the mix here and grab your coat, it’s about to be cold in here… BRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unsupervised Teen: “Just sippin on a squishee with my lysergic demon dogg, brah. Don’t touch my face.”
Slush Puppie: “You know that stuff stays in your spinal fluid forever and you’re gonna have cherry-flavored flashbacks and ice-cold brain damage right?”
Unsupervised Teen: “Whatevvvs.”

Music by Neon Indian

Keith Murray (Feat. LL Cool J) – Incredible

Busta Rhymes – Gimme Some More

D12 – Purple Pills

Biz Markie – T.S.R. (Toilet Stool Rap)

Ludacris – Stand Up

The DEA has reported that it’s latest initiative code named WEEZY F. BABY is already a huge success shortly after Lil Wayne was deployed to Mexico in order to locate and use up all of the drug supplies scattered throughout the country. Mexican officials are reporting that Wayne should have the entire country’s drug problem sewn up by the end of next month.

There’s that statistic out there that more people vote for bullshit television programs like American Idol than actually come out to vote for the leader of their country, a figure I’m sure was nullified by Team Obama. This isn’t a slam against Americans really – I mean you could certainly take this statistic and apply it to Canada, and readers from other countries can chime in about how it stacks up within their borders.

Voting time is nigh again though, and this time for something that actually matters. High Times Magazine would like for you to take a look through the hundreds of applicants for this year’s Miss High Times pageant. You can vote for each would-be incumbent via an out-of-ten-potleaf-system, with the highest (oh shit) score winning the much sought-after title.

For reasons that should be duly apparent to the Bloglin’s readership, I highly reccomend you cast 10’s for the above-pictured Juggalette “JDAR“. She hasn’t won yet, but together we can!

Happy Thanksgiving, to all the Mishkateers out there who are looking at the Bloglin on Thanksgiving. It is important that you spend this holiday with your family and Mishka is the only family you will ever need. We are setting up a compound in upstate New York and you should come by and check it out sometime for the rest of your life. We will starve and brainwash you and for every month you spend with us you’ll get a T-shirt exclusive to the Mishka inner-circle. We are worshipping the return of Sean Stussy or something like that. Long story short, I need this helmet.

It’s a helmet that someone lovingly applied Budweiser labels and resin to and it has a detachabe bubble that snaps onto the front. I am envisioning myself bicycling around in this thing, being safe but also clambaking hard inside my trouble bubble. If I owned this thing I could smoke in the shower without my cigarettes getting wetted out. Also I fall down a lot so this would help for that.

If you would like to buy this helmet for me it is currently going for $9.99. Get it for me and I will trade you a drawing or something. Lemme know. You can take it out in trade. Let’s make a deal, but hurry, there are only five days left.