Florida is a weird place. Recently I went on a trip there. To Florida. This is the first episode from the Florida series. Here, we investigate the existence of Super Target. It was just a big Target. Let’s go.

Elbows TV. It’s janky. The first episode is here. It’s with Nasty Nigel.

In the nineties, Dr. Rick Strassman propelled 60 willing psychonauts into extra dimensional hyperspace so he could stay behind and watch their bodies. While these volunteers shattered through illusionary space-time toward the straits of pure consciousness, Strassman and his nurse were monitoring their vital organs. No need for a bumpy flight home.

All that Strassman asked in return for sponsoring this get-a-far-far-away vacation was that he heard all about it. The high-doses of DMT he administered to them was no free ticket, he was working on a tourist booklet for the exotic vacationeer type.

In DMT: The Spirit Molecule Strassman chronicles his experiments with the psychoactive compound, found in our pineal gland as well as practically every living organism on the planet: Dimethyltryptamine. Today’s documentary is a sort of updated compendium to the book and is narrated by MMA, DMT, and HAHAHA guy, Joe Rogan.

The findings of Strassman reveal DMT’s contribution to be far beyond psychedelic experience, rather a vital tool in the human mind’s evolution. Here’s just one quote from one of the subjects:

“One thousand years in fifteen minutes. Well, to say the least, it was profound.”

Who’s the LA connect?

John Major Jenkins on Mayan Cosmology

We’ve all heard the noise and and seen the commercials, but I must confess that none of the 2012 harbingers have convinced me on what’s in store at the end of the Mayan calendar. Some preach positivity, some bark annihilation. Now, I’m down with a shift in consciousness heralding a new evolution of humanity, but these promising metaphysical ideologies are as unqualified as apocalyptic tomorrowlands. I can grasp most abstract concepts of astrophysics, mysticism and esoteria, but this is the end of the world and/or transformation of civilization coming our way. If this date is as luminous as the Maya believed, then there must be some type of salient effect on physical reality. Academic interpretations of ancient wisdom cant be all we have to harp on before we collide with 12.21.2012.

John Major Jenkins has been researching the Mayan calendar system for over twenty years and his books on 2012 have become essential materials for nearly all the investigative mythologists and pseudoscientists. According to his research, the Maya marked the 2012 winter solstice as the end point of their calendar in conjunction with an astronomical event which Jenkins has coined, the Galactic Alignment.

What is the Galactic Alignment?

Good question. As the Earth revolves around the sun, it wobbles on axis. This gravitational phenomena is called precession. Every 26,000 years, this precession cycle brings the December solstice back in line with the equator of the milky way — the exact center point between hemispheres of our galaxy.

Diagram of Earth’s precession

John Major Jenkins on Coast to Coast

This sacred date also marks the end of the 13 Baktun Cycle of time in the Mayan calendar.

Jenkins believes that the Ancient Maya were targeting a rare astronomical alignment in their calendar which will mark the end of a massive cosmic cycle of our planet and give rise to a new epoch. Yes, it is the end, but not a forecast of doomsday. Rather, the next phase of our astral continuum. In simplest terms, this is time and space beyond the grasp of the Mayan collective consciousness.

So what will happen when the milky way aligns itself? Mayan mythology foments a divine and spiritual transformation of mankind. Will it be the awakening to the fullest potential of the human mind? Or will Xibalba crack open and swallow us into the underworld? Some have prophesied the opening of a stargate and Light Beings riding the serpent god Quetzalcoatl through our dimension. Some even say the Maya were a tribe of ancient aliens… what do you believe?

Mayday 2011. Barry O ensured reelection in 2012 when he called an impromptu press conference to announce that he smoked that fool! Stoked NYC’ers moshed at ground zero, coal-hearted nerds made memes, clever people internetted cleverly, and network news editors worked feverishly to assemble music videos of Bin Laden’s greatest hits. Props due to Mr. President. Someone forward me the paypal address of the good ol’ boy who actually pulled the trigger, I want to buy him a beer. U-S-A! U-S-A! Bring on some bimbos in bikinis and crank the Godsmack, cuz we’re fuckin’ up yer program Al-Queda!

Right on cue is Alex Jones, asparagus pissing down my Miller Lite vortex bottle and diarrhea’ing all up in the salsa. Damn. Okay, pass the mike to AJ, let’s hear what the brother’s got to say…

Did Council on Foreign Relations member, Stephen R. Pieczenik, really claim that Bin Laden was already dead back in April 2002? Isn’t the burial at sea a bit… FISHY? Was Hitler really killed on Mayday as well? Is there any connection between these historic events and the fact that Adam Weishaupt established the Bavarian Illuminati on May 1, 1776? Really, Alex? Well, shit man. It could be all that Bin Laden weed being passed around, but when you put it that way, yeah. It does sound a bit suspicious. What else you got?

Woah, woah, woah. Dude’s been in deep freeze for the last ten years?!?!?!

Alex Jones was separately told by a high level Republican source that Bin Laden was dead and that his body was being kept “on ice” until Osama’s death could be announced at the most “politically expedient” time. When Jones asked the source if his claim was mere speculation or whether it was actually true, the source re-iterated the fact that he was being deadly serious and that Bin Laden’s corpse was “physically on ice” waiting to be rolled out for public consumption at the most opportune moment.

Many expected that moment to be right before the 2004 election, but after Democrats began speculating about the possibility, Republicans settled instead for a fake Osama video tape that was released on the eve of the election and, according to both George W. Bush and John Kerry, was the deciding factor in a closely-fought contest. Veteran news reader Walter Cronkite labeled the entire farce a Karl Rove-orchestrated “set-up”.

In addition to these sources, a deluge of other heads of state as well as intelligence agency professionals have gone on record over the past nine years to state their belief that Bin Laden was likely dead, after it became clear that the Al-Qaeda leader’s health was in severe decline as a result of kidney disease at the end of 2001.

Way to break up a party, AJ. Real smooth, guy. No, don’t help clean. Just get the fuck out.

David Icke discusses his latest, ‘Moon Matrix’ theory

Man, does David Icke drive a hard line! One minute you’re completely down for the cause of questioning your reality and deprogramming yourself from the mind control manipulation of government, society, and the school system … then he goes and starts talking about the Reptilian Agenda.

Goddamn reptiles. Fucking up everything!

David Icke on the Reptilian manipulation of Humanity

Some believe his Lizard bloodline theory is just a ruse to make everyone believe he’s crazy. Some believe he IS an agent of the Lizards indoctrinating us to the brainwash. I don’t bother with rationalizing with these sort of concepts or making judgments on David Icke. It’s really up to what the listener wants to hear. So…

David Icke is back with a new book, Human Race Get Off Your Knees where he exposes our Moon as a fake broadcast beacon created by the Shadow Rulers of Earth to hack into the human ‘body-computer’ system.

Fake Moon?! Okay Icke, what ya’ got?

Rupert Sheldrake lectures on the Morphogenetic Field Theory

Our society is governed by the scientific disciplines of materialism. We’re taught in universities that the most fundamental component in the universe is matter while our governments spend billions of dollars on Hadron Colliders in search of the “God Particle.” Is understanding the nature of the universe all about breaking matter down to it’s smallest form?

Is that how we’ll know exactly how certain atoms and compounds form into trees and crystals, while others human beings and plants? What really tells the cells what to do? Yes, genes play a essential role in coding and synthesizing proteins, but perhaps genes are only a component in the forming of living things. What is it that truly organizes all of this information?

Rupert Sheldrake is a biochemist and physiologist with Ph.D’s from Cambridge and Harvard who served as a Research Fellow of the Royal Society. He theorizes that matter isn’t the core component in biological phenomena, but an energy field that shapes and influences self organizing systems (any living thing) at all levels of complexity. Not to be mistaken with the mainstream definition, Sheldrake has been championing his Morphogenetic Field theory as the master key in understanding how life and the universe operate.

Discussion between Terence McKenna & Rupert Sheldrake on Morphic Resonance (the collective memory of Morphic Fields)

Think of the Morphogenetic Field as architectural blueprints, providing all the plans and information to the construction of a building. In this case, the building is us, a blade of grass, or an amoeba… ANY LIVING THING. Genes serve as the workers executing the blueprints, and every class of organism has their own blueprints as the Morphogenetic Field shapes them into organization.
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Can you see the signs? The Bloglin has become possessed by a brood of Witches whose coven lies deep below the grave of the Bava and Fulci section of Kim’s Underground video! If you listen close on the nights of the Crescent Moon you can hear their legion chanting out the occult prophecies buried within the lyrics of Tiffany and Real Life… and while Puritans were busy playing Ozzy records backwards, Witchy jagged toothed cackles bubble up from the abyss!

As season of the Witch takes full effect of the elements, the virgin initiates must bow to the High Overlord of the order… ALEX SANDERS. OOoooo

Like all Master Occultists, their biographies are skewed under a vague cloak. Though others claim different, Alex Sanders (1926-1988) recalls his first initiation to the black arts coming from his Wiccan grandmother. A bloodline ancestor of, Owain Glyndwr, the first King of the Witches, Grandma Sanders passed along the sacred wisdoms of witchcraft involving everything from the Book of Shadows to ritual sex with Alex.

Sanders:

“One evening in 1933, when I was seven, I was sent round to my grandmother’s house for tea. For some reason I didn’t knock at the door as I went in, and was confronted by my grandmother, naked, with her grey hair hanging down to her waist, standing in a circle drawn on the kitchen floor.”

Sanders attempted a dual life as an average Joe with a day job and Witch by night, but it eventually deteriorated his marriage and left an unfulfilled void in his life. Sanders faced a grim precipice, which led him to pledge devotion of his entirety to a life to Magic and Wicca… the complete immersion into the Left Hand Path. This submission into the Black Arts soon manifested an unforeseen source of dread in Sanders. After the suicide of one of his mistresses, Sanders took oath to use his powers as a healer and teacher to initiates. This is where his life turned to legend…

In the years following his white magic revelation, Sanders claimed to have healed the Cancer stricken, channeled past Wiccan mystics during seance, and even create a “Spiritual Baby” from an act of “sacred masturbation.” A newspaper article was written on the already too flamboyant Sanders in 1969, as well as a scandalous biography during the same year.

The movie, “Legend of the Witches,” is also allegedly based on his life and times. From all this mainstream publicity, Alex Sanders became an infamous pop star while the other witches grew resentment towards him as an exploiter of the craft. By 1965 he claimed 1,623 initiates in 100 covens, who crowned him with the sobriquet, King of the Witches.

This week, Alex Jones is taking on Wired Magazine regarding an article which discussed, amongst other topics, mood altering vaccinations. It’s the usual Jones vs. media outlet grudge where Jones is smeared as a paranoid conspiracy nut while counter evidence to his claims aren’t presented.

Look, the man has documents!

I thought it might be a good time to highlight the Bloglin lodge as to where this Alex Jones guy first got his claim to fame. It’s this 2000 documentary where he infiltrated the secret society of global elitists’ annual gathering at Bohemian Grove.

AJ broke the inside secrets of this occult cabal to the masses… or well, the tens of thousands I guess.

Manly P. Hall was a well celebrated critical thinker, social analyst and O.G. conspiracy theorist. In this lecture, he discusses how our obsession with the past can create a destructive pattern when we live exclusively within it. I’ve struggled with this sort of self sabotage my whole life and it’s something I have to constantly pull the reins in on.

I’ve seen it ruin friends and family members to the point where the past is the only identity they have. It’s one of the saddest things to see someone who you love disappear into that abyss. If you find yourself dwelling on issues from your past to the point that it affects your present day, then break the cycle now before it dictates your future. Live NOW. There is no tomorrow.

Daniel Pinchbeck – a 2012′er I can actually get behind

I’ve always avoided the 2012 Doom Merchants and their far fetched forecasts of apocalyptic disaster. For decades they’ve been selling the paranoid paranoia and hocking self-published books typed in a priori fonts of unaccountability. The sky will boil. Water to blood. Ohh oh your city lies in dust, my friend. Brochures of a wasteland vacation for the cataclysmic tourist. And now that will call for the holocaust opens in less than 2 years, all the sopranos are changing the lyrics to our favorite song.

Well, we never really meant that the world will explode into shards, little boys and girls, it was just metaphor. An allegory for the awakening that is truly at hand! What I really meant is… well it’s all explained in my new revolutionary book that will change the way you see the world! Step right up!

Daniel Pinchbeck and Graham Hancock discuss the real 2012… great stuff in here

How much money has been made off some ancient calendar whose scribes figured they’ve done enough heavy lifting for the time being? Map out 2013 later, we’re late to the Shaman’s Ayahuasca vision quest ceremony! How’s this theory: It’s the end of an epoch where one astrological cycle ends and a new one begins.

In fact, things have never been better! We’re in great shape. Look at how much money we all have! Look at all the businesses that are booming and we all just got a raise! Oh wait, scratch that. Well, at least our water is clean, right? Oh yeah. Well at least we aren’t in the throes of everlasting holy war. What’s that you say?
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