This guy is like Tron but if he (probably) had a beard, smoked weed, and caught a disease in the hot tub one winter. Seriously though, this is pretty insane. It looks like he’s snowboarding in space or something, catching an edge on the particulate matter that rims a dark planet’s gravitational sphere, getting air on the outside of a Dyson sphere covered in celestial ash. Or maybe just smoking DMT and running around naked with a flashlight in front of your open freezer.

This wild LED suit was created by photographer Jacob Sutton to be used by mountain-bro William Hughes for… well I guess just to make people on the internet go ^___^. I think it’s high time I got to work on my own lightsuit. Just think of all the things you could do: Never be afraid of vampires. Pretend you’re an angel. Make a lot of friends at a rave. Eat a sandwich, but in the lightsuit. Endless possibilites…

Mishka fan and funny man Andy Milonakis apparently has quite a thing for gummy candies. So much so that he tracked down a grape gummy bear that’s about the size of a real bear cub. This 26 pounds of gummified goodness runs at $150 and you can buy your very own here. The website helpfully suggests that the thing should be carved like a fucking turkey. I’m pretty sure this happened in a Simpson’s episode.

Anyway, watch Andy put his bear through all the standard gummy tests including liquid retention, tenderization exercises, gravity response times, resiliency, sock cleaning utility and ability to make it all the way down a trash chute. I wonder if we can get a custom Bear Mop version of this…

Part of me feels bad, because I sort of see a past version of myself in this kid: the escapist, I have no friends, the internet is the only place that accepts me parts. But on the other hand: bahahahaha. What a dumb fucker! I like Dragon Ball Z too, even though it never really delivered on anything and Mr. Popo made me pretty uncomfortable, but I’m pretty sure I never ripped my shirt off my emaciated sad sack torso and screamed bloody murder trying to go super saiyan in my bedroom.

It appears that I was not missing out on anything good. There is a high probability that this is not real, but I’m just going to disregard that and continue to know that, no matter what, this dude’s day was probably way worse than mine. With 90,000 views and counting, this dude “The Secreted” himself into fame alright, but it wasn’t for saving the world from Vegeta. It was for looking like a dingus. Thanks internet.

It’s sort of a damn shame that we don’t get video games made about celebrities or rappers or even specific athletes anymore. Sure there’s Tiger Woods Golf and some BS Shaun White snowboard stuff, but what happened to the trend of being those characters in situation completely out of their realm of expertise? The Enter The 36 Chambers Wu Tang fighting game. Michael Jordan: Chaos In The Windy City. 50 Cent: Blood On The Sand. Shaq Fu. Oh right, that’s why. Shaq Fu.

Largely considered one of the worst games of all time, Shaq Fu stars the big aristotle as a dimension travelling kung fu fighter who’s trying to save little kids from evil blah blah blah wow it was terrible. It sold like hotcakes and by hotcakes I mean some sort of cold, rotten, utterly unsellable cake. I had a copy for my Game Gear (woof).There are still an absurd amount of unsold copies of this Genesis game floating around. Instead of burying them in the desert (like Atari did with the ET Game) this dumbass kid with cam-whore hair and an “edgy” lip piercing bought a bunch of copies to blow up with his dad. Just kidding guy, I’m not trying to badmouth you. Mostly because you look like a really good shot.

Via Destructoid

One of a film nerd pedant’s favorite dumb gripes/awkward attempted conversation starters is winging about how, though we’re approaching the dates visited in the film, our technology is, “like, totally different than how it is in Back To The Future II!” In a bizarre attempt to ameliorate these people, companies continue to manufacture fake version of the products from those movies that don’t even vaguely purport to mimic their function, only their form, and this seems to make people happy. Commerce is weird.

Continuing that trend, following last year’s Nike MAG (sidenote: I feel like they could have made a self-tying shoe. I mean maybe it couldn’t tie itself, but at least tighten itself or something), this Winter Mattel will be releasing a replica of the hoverboard Marty McFly steals. Well, technically it’s a hoverscooter that he rips the handlebars off but – oh fuck now I’m being the pedant. Anyway, it doesn’t hover but apparently it “glides” over most things which I guess means it’s plastic? Thanks guys, how awesome. Here, here’s all our monies.

Woo-ha, that’s a pretty good one. It’s already been a good year for Мишка cakes, let’s keep this gravy (err, icing) train on a rollin’. This one comes from a strange, mystical continent known as Europe. Weird! Where’s that? Our new friend Sjoerd Krijnen, who lives in The Netherlands in the city of Haarlem (namesake for our own borough. The more you know!) just had his birthday and he celebrated with this bitchin’ ocular desert.

Special shouts to the bakery responsible for it, Patisserie Elhorst. Keep doing what your doing, you beautiful Dutch bastards! And a very happy belated birthday to you Sjoerd. The fact that you started your e-mail to us with “Hey people at the Мишка Brotherhood of Blood” made my week. You sir, are a true mopster.

I apologize in advance for being a total fanboy, but I’m gonna post two Double Fine/Tim Schafer things this week and that’s just gonna be something that happens. I already talked about how Markus “Notch” Persson, creator of Minecraft, was considering funding a sequel to Psychonauts. But what about the stuff Tim Schafer is really known for: my (and a lot of other people’s) beloved adventure games? Well well, it seems he hasn’t left those behind either.

Because he knows no major game studio will fund the new adventure game he wants to make, Schafer turned to his fans, recently starting a Kickstarter to fund a brand new game! Yay! They wanted $400,000, but with over a month left to go they’re already above $1,000,000, shattering Kickstarter records. Looks like this game will be even more awesome than they thought. Anyone who loves adventure games or having fun should donate. If you pledge $15 or more, you get a copy of the game anyway. SIDENOTE: notice how Tim points out that the doc crew filming him in above video is affiliated with Notch. Further evidence!!

Whether it be on tumblr, dump.fm, in The Whitney, or MoMA PS1, internet art has really made it to the big time now. Which is why, obviously, it has to be commoditized. Who’s ready for some tee shirts with exorbitant price tags? You are, you little #seapunk you. Aww c’mon, don’t hate me internet, I was just kidding. I love you and your ever-repeating geocities style of artistic expression. Never leave me.

What’s that? Oh right, the shirts. Yeah, so internet artist Sterling Crispin commissioned some of his favorite frendz including Pictureplane, Ryder Ripps, and Laura Brothers to create these krazy kewl all over print shirts. They’re on sale now here, but act fast and furious because they’re limited to ten each! Oh yeah, and they’re $147. Buy yourself a place in internet art history! Hack the planet!

A while back my compatriot Casper posted about a wonderful short film called Roid Rage, directed by one Ryan Lightbourn. Concerning a gentlemen with a certain mutated butthole malady. His hemorrhoid is sentient, angry, and hungry for human brains. Now, thank goodness, there’s a holiday themed sequel, Roid Rage: The Christmas Special. It is, in a word, fantastic.

Featuring the ‘roid killer as a contracted assassin with a dark past and a bloody future, Christmas Special casts Santa Claus as a perverted meth manufacturer with a propensity for bald midgets, and an all around bad dude who needs to be stopeed. Enter ‘roid, and arrows the eye, skulls cleaved in twain, intestinal nooses, and oh so much more. Can we get a full length?

Few things are more romantically American than a good ol’ fashioned diner. Much like Southern high school football teams, automobile factories, and surf communes, you need only shoot them with an HD camera and throw on some moody music to make it look profound as fuck. There’s this video series done by  NY Based production crew Lost & Found called This Must Be The Place. I guess it’s about “home” or something, but I just like the one about Prime Burger, a NY sammich joint that’s been cooking patties since 1938.

Whether it’s production trickery or not, this place really looks like a time capsule. Especially since there’s an employee who’s interviewed that, if his dates are correct, is about 90 years old and doesn’t look at day over 70. Guess that’s what you get for eating greasy spoon food everyday for 59 years. I wish they would do one of these about the Cup & Saucer on Canal Street. I’ve lived down the street from that octogenarian luncheonette for some years now, and it’s rife with nostalgic wonder. Feel free to steal that idea, internet.

Via Grub Street