You may remembering Devo re-recording their song Whip It as “Swiff It” for a Swiffer commercial. Now they’ve made “Brush It” for a toothbrush that plays music inside your head. This opens up a Pandora’s box of what will be next. Musical tampons and toilet paper dispensers? You can’t parody Devo because they beat you to it every time.
Yesterday my White Spider post spawned an email from my homie Darryl Polio Legs. He sent me a response to White Spider with a video by an indivdual who calls himself Madness Reign. I honestly think this man is a hidden jewel in this vast northern land(Quebec)! Watch and see for yourself, this dude shreds the GNARRR! I don’t even know if you will able to believe it.
SYMPTÔME DE POSSESSION
SOCIAL FUCKER
LIVE CKRL 89.1FM (JUST TO SHOW YOU HE IS NOT JOKING!)
Oh and you will see why…
If you haven’t checked out StaggStreet.com yet, what are you waiting for! Ellen Stagg gives us the best boner shorts almost on a daily basis. Today, she posted some unreleased photos from our Summer 2008 Lookbook! Enjoy! NSFW!
Anyone who knows me, they know how into toys I am. Especially Kaiju! One of the Kaiju Blogs that I check on the regular is Omni-Monster!!!
Omni-Monster!!! always has great images of Kaiju. Actually some of the best out there!
I actually posted quite some time ago about a Carlos Enriquez piece that he had on his site, and Geozilla pointed out that I never credited him. I know in this day and age you should credit another blog for photos and content… It’s not only the right, but the courteous thing to do and I apologize for neglecting to do so way back when.
So check out the site and especially it’s archives. They spend a lot of time and hard work getting you some great photos of new and vintage Kaiju! Something I think a lot of Mishka fans may be interested to see and not even realize it yet!
Im not talking about this, I am talking about a report out of the West Palm Beach News that reported that Latarian beat his grandma in a Walmart after she woudn’t buy him chicken wingz.
This is seriously insane. I guess lil’ Ease has been taken away for a mental evaluation.
As I was walking back to the office from lunch, I spotted this next level masterpiece in the storefront window of TELCO, one of many local Broadway businesses. Is this a Baby Murko Mouse ready to chop up unsuspecting hypebeasts? I can’t wait to see what this place has in store for the future.
I watched True Romance last night, and despite having seen this film quite a few times, I totally forgot about this gem of a scene. I definitely hadn’t forgotten about Brad Pitt’s role as a stereotypical wastoid stoner, but the real beauty of this film lies in the details. Nothing like rocking out to a little Soundgarden while catching a post-wake ‘n’ bake buzz.
My first true taste of Metallica came when I was about 9 or 10 and … And Justice For All came out, which like the album pictured above was viewed as a total sellout by fans back then. Was it? I don’t think so now and I didn’t think so then but I hadn’t even reached puberty yet, nor know tit from tat about thrash. I just thought Metallica was pretty fucking bad ass. I eagerly sought out Ride the Lightening, Master of Puppets and started exploring whatever other thrash metal I could with my measly resources.
When I was 13, Metallica came back after a long absence with the Black Album. Thanks to the Black Album thrash metal had broken through, but the Black Album wasn’t really thrash metal at all. And there lies the conundrum! I won’t even try to be all cool and jaded and pretend I didn’t love the Black Album when it came out, because I did. While it didn’t exactly sound like the Metallica of yore, what the fuck did it matter? There’s bitchin’ old man in the Enter Sandman video was my stance! Thanks to the Black Album you could wear metal tees to class and not get made fun of, girls out of nowhere started taking an interest in metal, me and all my friends were forming crappy bands left and right and even my dad started digging Metallica! So all and all it was pretty fucking good times!
Metallica were like Jesus selling out metal to save our prepubescent souls! But of course I had to start getting older and seeing the error of Metallica’s ways!!! Fuck you Metallica!!! Hard Rock & Thrash must never cross paths you sell-outs, Never EVER!!!! Except as a guilty pleasure for us poseurs of course!
I’ve been spending a lot of time with my sketchbook lately.
*Editor’s Note: My alternative title to this blog post was going to be “The Gun is Good. The Penis is Evil.”
This dude plays Guitar Hero.
P.S. There are too many categories. Proceeds from this picture will go to all the charities and benefits found on the bloglin.
P.S.S. Feel free to protest. :D
Did you ever just want one more awesome NIN song? Because lord knows Trent Reznor isn’t going to ever give you one… at least not until he maybe relapses and he may even be too far gone for that to even matter in making his music anymore. Thankfully Richard Patrick took it upon himself to do just that, give us that one last good NIN song. Besides fronting Filter Richard Patrick is best known for toiling under Trent Reznor’s thumb as NIN’s guitarist and being Robert Patrick’s brother… Who is Robert Patrick? The T-motherfucking-1000!!!!
I feel kind of conflicted putting Short Bus up here because truth be told it’s isn’t really that awesome of an album… it’s carried solely on the weight of Hey Man Nice Shot AKA the best NIN song they never wrote. The rest of the album sounds all the same, 90s aggro-industrial pretty hate machine rejects. But hey so many strive to sound like Pretty Hate Machine rejects and failed so as backhanded as it may sound it is an accomplishment of sorts. Dose is an OK track, but that’s still pushing it. You can sometimes find downloads of Short Bus where someone has thankfully included Filter’s only other really good track… a collaboartion with The Crystal Method, (Can’t You) Trip Like I Do from the Spawn Soundtrack.
But like I said Filter’s ode to Budd Dwyer and not Kurt Cobain (as was rumored when the song came out) Hey Man Nice Shot is that good (at least to me) to propel this bad boy to an awesomely awful album canon! It’s totally the best song ever written about putting a gun in your mouth and pulling the trigger… if that can even be considered an accomplishment!
On a side note. The Wiz (RIP) that used be across teh street from my house used to have Filter mislabeled as FITLER! Hahaha Fitler!
Although Marylin Manson would single handedly spearhead the Mall Goth revolution of the mid 90s… it was Type O Negative that laid that initial seed a year earlier with Bloody Kisses. After the collapse of Brooklyn thrashers Carnivore in the late 80sPete Steele took a major left turn and formed Type O Negative who in ‘91 released a mess of an album called Slow, Deep & Hard. A poorly executed concept album about a failed relationship that kind of threw everything and the kitchen sink into itself stylistically. The songs were super long and It was parts metal, parts goth, parts punk & parts hardcore and I couldn’t tell if it or the lyrics were supposed to be taken seriously. The best way I could describe it is that Tool would would later on do exactly what this album tried to do but do it successfully.
2 years later came Bloody Kisses and while they still over indulged their own songs by 3-5 minutes this time they got it right and wrong in every way and voila! An Awesomely Awful Album was born! I was never certain if Pete Steele took himself or Type O seriously back then, but listening back to Black No. 1 now I can totally see that everything they did was tongue in cheek. Check out the lyrics to Black No. 1… they’re hilarious, at least to me!
“She’s got a date at midnight - with Nosferatu
oh baby, Lilly Munster - ain’t got nothing on you “
or
“Yeah you wanna go out ’cause it’s raining and blowing
you can’t go out ’cause your roots are showing
dye em black - dye em black “
Add Christian Women, a sludgy cover of Summer Breeze & of course We Hate Everyone and you have everything that was horrible, sad & forever sullied the notion of goth rock BUT was equally awesome and irresistible all at the same time.
Original Basket Case VHS box! Found this on the web somewhere. One of my all time favorites!
Despite popular lore, I think Aerosmith was in fact the band who signed a deal with the Devil and not Led Zeppelin. There isn’t any other 70s hard rock relic that somehow manages to dupe most of the public into seeming relevant with each passing decade and every new album. Yet Tyler, Perry & Co. do each and every time, How!?? The Devil’s trickery I say! Get A Grip came out at that point in your life when you were just getting past Motley Crüe, G’nR, etc, etc and full on into Nirvana, Mudhoney & Soundgarden. It was beyond cheesy but that lingering hair metal in you couldn’t resist! And then of course there were the videos… Dude the videos! I think more than anything it was the videos and not the songs that made this such an awesomely awful nicely aged chunk of Gouda.
You had the teen libido power play of an Alicia Silverstone video trilogy (with a Liv Tyler cameo of course). Then there was Aerosmith’s keen eye to such 90’s hot button issues like virtual-reality! How could one not be suckered in? But the video and song I couldn’t get enough of was Livin’ On the Edge! That video is so over the top “lets make it resonate with 90s teens” retarded that it’s amazing! Eddie Furlong, doing his John Conner meets Jeremy impression, catholic school girl field hockey delinquents, a teacher in drag, air-bag joy rides, that weird green dude that pops out of a naked Steven Tyler and of course Joe Perry playing chicken with a locomotive. Now that’s a music video!
Those of you living in the UK that have a little extra loot lying around should consider taking a once in a lifetime trip on Ed Force One, with none other than Bruce Dickinson as your trusty pilot. If you’re wondering what you get for the £349-399 fare, then scope out the kick ass travel package.
- Exclusive themed Bruce Air ED FORCE ONE goodie bag
- Personally signed photo of Bruce in Ed Force One
- Standing ticket to the Iron Maiden concert
- Bus transfers at destination to venue and to and from hotel where trip includes hotel.
I think it’s obvious that we’re a bunch of headbanging Maiden fans, and we can only pray to Satan that Maiden expands the U.S. portion of their tour. Unfortunately, we probably won’t be flying Bruce Air 666 if Maiden decides to add more east coast dates.
My homeboy Erock just sent me this excerpt from an Ohio newspaper. I’d like to know what exactly the perpetrator in this crime was thinking when he not only started videotaping a dude jacking off, but then proceeded to feed ’shrooms to the dog. Were they magic mushrooms? Was the dude tripping out himself? Was it a hi-8 or digital camcorder? Is it possible that this video could end up on youtube? Or better yet, redtube?
Dennis (Glamnation) put it best when he said “thats the kinda criminal peeps should aspire to be.” I couldn’t have said it better myself.
My desk is covered in Star Wars toys right now, which prompted a short discussion between the Crook and I in regards to the Imperial rankings of Darth Vader and Grand Moff Tarkin. This is how we keep ourselves entertained when we’re not busy creating “dat crack.” Thank you Wikipedia for clearing up any misconceptions.
Organization of power
Emperor Palpatine rules the Empire with absolute power, with third-in-command Sate Pestage as Grand Vizier to run the Empire day to day. Vader is the Emperor’s second-in-command as well as the Military Executor and Supreme Commander of the Imperial Forces.
Palpatine dissolves the Senate in A New Hope because the Empire discovers several seats in the Senate are actually taken by members of the Rebellion. Officially, the Imperial Senate is “suspended for the duration of the Galactic emergency”. Below the Emperor, real power is in the hands of sector governors (”moffs“) such as Grand Moff Tarkin. Eventually, the regional governors are granted direct control over their territories after Palpatine disbands the Imperial Senate.
In A New Hope, Tarkin explains the Empire’s philosophy as “rule through fear of force rather than force itself”. The instrument of this power is the military, which includes the Imperial Stormtroopers, Scout Troopers, Sandtroopers, SCUBA Troopers, Snowtroopers, and a large fleet of intimidating war vehicles such as the Imperial Navy’s Star Destroyers and the Imperial Army’s All Terrain Armoured Transports (AT-ATs or imperial walkers) which are intended in part to spread fear as well as destroy the enemy. This policy reaches its zenith with the construction of the Death Star.
Continuing my series of albums so awful that they’re awesome I bring you the third in the series. Live’s Throwing Copper. Unlike STP & Bush who earned honers as the #1 and 2 in my series, Live never drew my ire or elicited any sort of violent reaction from me in the 90s. They kind just “were” and my attention always passed over their existence whenever their songs were played. In actually sitting down and really listening to throwing copper I was actually kinda shocked that there were 5 fucking bona fide hit singles on this one album (I’m noticing that’s a trend on this list)! I always thought most of these songs were scattered across various other albums Live may have put out and I ignored.
So what makes this album so awfully awesome? Well Live seems to have this magical way of writing lyrics that are so beyond cheesy they’re actually heartfelt. Like Freshman Seminar poetry you want to laugh at but don’t because the kid writing/reading it is a really nice guy. Dude managed to find away to slip placenta into song lyrics! PLACENTA! It’s like that movie that goes so out of it’s way to play on your heartstrings and make you cry, and you know it, find it silly, cheesy, but you cry anyway!*
Secondly, Live sound like that AWESOME (read sarcasm… well only partially so) band from your High School**. I’d like to imagine that had their been a Degrassi on during the 90s the band that would have formed in that show would have sounded just like Live. Like they would have gotten together after school to jam out on their fave R.E.M. tracks and just riff it from there. They probably would have had the editor of the school newspaper as the frontman, that jock type dude who wasn’t a total douche on bass, etc, etc. I don’t know about you, but that sounds pretty fucking killer to me brah!
Thirdly Ed Ed Kowalczyk badass rat tail braid!!!! KILLER!
And finally What the fuck was up with the video for I Alone!?? Where the fuck were the drums that day!? Why is he just swaying along behind Ed Kowalczyk? It’s fucking creepy!!! Wait… did VH1’s Pop-Up Videos cover this already?
*Don’t cry you pussies!
**Live actually WERE that band from High School, no joke!