I bet you guys weren’t aware that they’re filming a movie about the life and loves of one Johny “Prolly” Watson. The film is called Get Pitted! and oddly enough stars Joseph Gordon-Levitt as John Prolly. I guess they wanted to go younger instead of having Donal Logue play our favorite redheaded Viking.

Ok I’m actually pulling your leg, there’s no movie about Prolly in the works (However EA’s Prolly’s Pitted 2011 is totally real), but Joseph Gordon-Levitt is currently in NY filming a movie about bike messengers called Premium Rush. I guess JGL opted not to use a stunt rider a few days ago when he went through the back window of a cab which he then documented the aftermath via video on his Tumblr.

So why the hell am I posting this? Well one it gives me something to tease Prolly with and two because gives me the opportunity to post about Joseph Gordon-Lovitt’s brother’s Tumblr…

JGL has a brother named Dan who has his own tumblr called Burning Dan and, well, Dan is very much a psychedelic warrior. Here’s how Dan describes himself:

I travel the world teaching people to spin fire and be who they want to be. I’m a Flow Artist, performance photographer, swashbuckler, computer programmer and internet citizen bent on saving the world with panache.

I’ve performed on broadway, naked oil wrestled an albino and a porn star, started a school, been in a hurricane, taught a room full of 100 black people to dance, stood on an erupting volcano and built a pillow fort on an airplane. I helped build hitRECord.  I seek to inspire and be inspired in every interaction with everybody I meet. Especially you.

That’s right he taught a room full of 100 black people to dance. Again he taught a room full of 100 black people to dance. WTF!?!? Wait another choice quote from his blog…

Today, I was on a bus in a frontish row and a family of black people tried to get on the bus. The only open seats were behind me in the back. The family felt like they couldn’t squeeze past me to the open seats behind. So I moved to the back of the bus so the black family could have my seat near the front.

I am “Danny, champion of the civil rights.”

His blog is full of so much unintentional hilarity that I wouldn’t be surprised if it all wasn’t some elaborate act, but somehow I doubt that.

I bet YuDu!  Full disclosure, YuDu used some of our Fall 2010 graphics for this infomercial in exchange for hooking us up with our own sweet YuDu set-up. I think it’s our best season ever. Really feeling the butterfly design Mike Jones did the most.

It looks like the announcement of the Eli Porter documentary, The People’s Champion has opened the floodgates for Eli to finally come out of the woodwork. In this fresh new Eli clip, Eli sets the record straight on a few issues like if he’s dead (no, duh), that no, he’s not retarded and If he still keeps in touch with Marv-O, J-Dubb and all of dem (Eli don’t holler at dem no mo, but they still coo).

I honestly can’t understand half the shit Eli is saying cause he keeps his slang too trill for me, but I did catch that he’s just Grindin’ and he got a Mixtape comin out “July sumptin.” Eli also claims that that The People’s Champion is also coming out around then, but I don’t think so.

I didn’t even know iDrugs existed until I read this feature from The Oklahoman, but now all I want to do is try some!* Can you buy them via iTunes? Either way it looks like you just got beat as the gateway drug of choice Pot!

Young people plug into i-dosers through putting on headphones and downloading music and tones that create a supposed drug-like euphoria.

Please post links in the comment section to your favorite iDrug pushers or if there even are others besides iDoser. and read this article for more information.

*I’m too scared to try these soundwave drugs actually. So you do it and tell me if it works in the comments!

Me? I Love it LOTS.

Everyone knows what dingleberries are…right?

If so I got your lucky break right here mah ninjettes, because Juggalo Bail Bonds wants you! Judging by these reports Juggalos seem to always be in and out of trouble with the law, so why trust your bail to anyone but another member of the Dark Carnival!?! This is a million dollar idea!

NEW BAIL BONDS COMPANY; JUGGALO BAIL BONDS, OPENING SHORTLY IN DETROIT AND IS IN NEED OF JUGGALETTES FOR PHOTOS TO USE IN ONLINE AD CAMPAIGN TO GET WORD OUT ABOUT COMPANY.

THE JUGGALO BONDSMAN IS LOOKING FOR LETTES OF ALL AGES TO POSE IN FULL HATCHET GEAR AND/OR PAINT TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED FOR ONLINE ADS PROMOTING JUGGALO BAIL BONDS.

RESPOND TO INTAKE@METRODETROITCASTING.COM WITH AGE, PHOTOS, AND CONTACT INFORMATION AND AVAIBALITY. LO’S WILL ALSO ME CONSIDERED.

THIS IS UNPAID; BUT, YOU WILL RECIEVE CREDIT AND WILL BE ELIGABLE FOR LISTING ON METRODETROITCASTING.COM AT NO CHARGE WHICH WILL GIVE YOU EXPOSURE TO LOCAL CASTING AND MODELING COMPANIES FOR FUTURE FILM, TV AND MODELING POSSIBILITIES.

Judging from the ad an ability to spell is not really a prerequisite. The ad also doesn’t really specify if they’re looking for “Necksnappaz” or “Fat Floppy Titty Freaks,” so I have to imagine it’s both. God I hope it’s both. I wonder if Juggalo Bail Bonds has already tried recruiting from the ranks of Juggalettes Gone Wicked? If not, they should…mmmmmm.

If anyone actually sees these ads whenever they do go live, you know where to forward them… right here! Woop Woop!

via Videogum

Look I know it’s  low blow to make fun of babies but I need content ova here! And come on look at this kid!? He’s got a face growing on top of his face!?!? The fuck!?? I didn’t even know that was a possible deformity.

None of the articles are clear about if there’s skin, another nose and upper lip behind his “mask” or not. I’m going to assume there is because they discuss that “treating his condition would be very expensive.” I can’t imagine you could “treat” this unless there actually was another face underneath his “mask.”

It’s really just an amazingly unfortunate cleft that just happens to run across most of his face. The media is dubbing him either “Mask Boy” or “Double Face” and I think this kid has a bright future ahead of him as the awesomest super villain the Earth has known!

More info and follow-up links here.

I stumbled up this video yesterday and I was losing it.  This company, Cold Steel, makes these videos for every single different sword they make.  But this one, for their GREAT SWORD, was by far the silliest.  We see dudes cut Rope, Pigs, Boots, Hunks o’ Meat, Huge Ice Cubes, Bamboo, Balloons, Animal Heads, Barrels With Liquid…NOTHING IS SAFE!  And everything the guy says is awesome.

“That’s what a Great Sword is all about, deep penetration!”

Nice!

Crook’s post (below) reminded me of this link I had sitting in my ‘to blog’ file. In name only, but still. I had originally stumbled across it via the Titty City twitter feed (extraordinary, btw) who found it from The World’s Best Ever, who apparently came across it via Nippon Cinema.

Either way, I think it’s amazing. I shall attempt to transcribe the opening voiceover, as it is—arguably, I know—the best part:

Kyonyu Dragon
Onsen Zombie v. Strippers 5

The boobs to die for.
The big titty dragons.

Strippers 5 vs. Zombies

Nyotai Mori Zombie!
Ping Pong Zombie!
Sushi Zombie!
Geisya Zombie!
Samurai Zombie!

And more!

Money!, Money!, Money!
Cash!, Cash!, Cash!

And more!

Banzai! Fujyama!

Indeed. Indeed.