It’s right about that time to start dusting off your kicks and heading down to the parks and gyms. Prepare to be embarrassed physically and emotionally by dudes that have spent more hours watching And-1 mixtapes, than you’ve seen your girl. Awe at that 2 or 3 dudes that can dunk with impunity and thus become your neighborhood’s version of Blake Griffin. Hit your homeboy with an ill God Shammgod inspired crossover, have a story to tell for at least the next two months. This my friends, is the magic of the summer long season of pickup basketball.

Doin It In The Park is a new documentary chronicling the history and importance of pickup basketball, with input from legends like Dr. J, Kenny Anderson, and Pee-Wee Kirkland. Hopefully they have a section that covers amazing pickup game related fights, and the subtle logistics of “man b” and “you got next?”.

Doin It In The Park is out now in select theaters and available for download here.

Walt “Clyde” Frazier dresses like a cartoon pimp and routinely speaks in polysyllabic rhyme. He’s a basketball legend and an announcer for the Knicks. He more than likely has complete outfits made of Ostrich, Alligator, and several other descendants of the dinosaurs. He may or may not actually be a pimp.

The ESPN 30 for 30 documentary, Disdain For The Mundane, traces the origins of Frazier’s “distinct” style and his extensive vocabulary, to his strong desire to not be average. Even if you don’t like basketball or the sex trade, this short video’s got a ton of quotables, that’ll prove useful in many scenarios. Especially so, when someone walks up on you and asks you why you’re wearing a button up shirt with a pattern of discreet skulls on it.

“I wear this shirt good sir, because of my strong disdain for the mundane. Now where the hell is my money? Good day.”

Basketball player that looks kind of like Baraka from Mortal Kombat terrorizes New York City during the mid nineties through psychological warfare and 3 pointers. Part of ESPN’s 30 for 30 series.

Brace yourself Brooklyn, the Islanders are a comin’ to town. At a time when hockey related news is at a premium with the NHL in the midst of its third lockout in 18 years, Isles fans (all three of them) will be relieved their team isn’t moving to Kansas City or Canada. Instead, they will remain on Long Island with the glitz and glamor that is the Barclays Center which is the new home of your New Jersey Brooklyn Nets.

With the end of their lease at the Nassau Mausoleum after the 2014 season, the Islanders will pick up and head to their new home in 2015 where they will remain for the next 25 years which by then you will need actual lenses in your ironic glasses. Since they will stay on the Island, the logo and jerseys won’t be touched despite wearing these monstrosities.

A move to Brooklyn can be nothing but good for a team that is constantly at the bottom of the attendance table thanks in part to the second oldest building in the league. You can step into the 70′s only so many times before it becomes old and come 2015 the Islanders and their fans can finally join the 21st century.

Their proximity to the Rangers and Devils will make both rivalries even stronger as the dreaded LIRR and car rides will cease to be. So get ready Brooklyn, you didn’t want the Nets to begin with and now you also get the Islanders. Enjoy.

We’re happy to remind all of you that two of our Mishka affiliated fighters will all be competing within the span of the next 48 hours in their respective departments of ass kicking.

Tonight, Diego Lopez will be standing across another human being, inside of a cage, moments before a bell is rung, signaling for both men to legally punch, kick, knee, elbow, and throw each other, until one is no longer able to do so. The bout will be taking place in Jackson, NJ, and the Williamsburg MMA School will be in attendance to support our fighter.

Muay Thai Mishka affiliated young fighter Jay Matias will be representing Sitan Gym out in Richmond, VA tomorrow. He’s looking to avenge a loss that stems back to 2007, and become one step closer from being ranked Number 1 in the U.S. under WBC. Matias is also looking to win the first ever WKA Full Rules Pro Title in his weight class.

South Williamsburg’s own, and full blown Mishka supporter; Zachary ‘ZUNGRY’ Ochoa was scheduled to have his second pro bout tomorrow; unfortunately his opponent pulled out of today before the weigh ins. He’s looking for a possible bout next month, and we’ll be behind him 100 percent.

The NHL playoffs have been nothing short of spectacular this year as hockey’s second season has given us controversy, bloodshed, agony and triumph of euphoric proportions. Now after almost eight weeks it comes down to two teams giving it their all for the right to lift the best trophy in sports. Below you will find a comprehensive look at the match-up between Jersey’s finest and some dumb team from California.

(6) New Jersey Devils vs. (8) Los Angeles Kings

The Devils welcome the Kings for game 1 (tonight 8 pm, NBC) having disposed of the rival Rangers in six games (just like someone predicted) and return to the Finals for the first time in nine years. Last time around they played host to another Southern California team which fell to the Devils in 7 games giving them their third cup in 8 years.

The Devils enter the finals as the underdog for the third straight series having disposed of the Flyers and top-seeded Blueskirts respectively. They are likely still riding the wave of emotion brought to them by Adam Henrique’s second OT winner of the playoffs last Friday. While all the talk has been about the Kings impressive 12-2 record while being undefeated on the road, the Devils have faced tougher opponents and been pushed to within a goal of elimination twice. Overcoming such feats and winning 4 of the 5 OT sessions could be the difference maker. Martin Brodeur looked great against the Rangers pulling out all kinds of wacky ass saves and Kovalchuk kept on scoring big goals in big spots while the fourth line also did their part. Its the beauty of the playoffs when you see grinders not known for their goal scoring abilities come through in the clutch.

The same could be said for the Kings but I would be lying to you if I knew much about them going into the playoffs. Netminder, Jonathon Quick is one damn good goalie who stands in the crease at a really bizarre angle; shooting high is advisable. They have a decent eastern Euro of their own named Anze Kopitar who wears a really dumb dark visor because he thinks he’s Alex Ovechkin. Then you got Dustin Brown, Dustin Penner, and Drew Doughty or the 3 D’s of doom. That’s likely not their nickname but it damn well should be.

Regardless of the outcome, the Kings being in the Cup Final could only be good for the state of California as hockey elitists laugh at the idea of hockey succeeding in a non-wintery area. Plus think about all the bandwagon fans they’ll get by the end, it already started. Based on that above picture and past posts it shouldn’t really surprise you that I am picking the Devils in 6 only because I don’t want to cancel my Canadian vacation should there be a game 7. Suck it LA.

Spartak’s Playoff Picks: 7-7 with three perfect series

Hi there Mopsters, today I’d like to discuss the Sweet Science. My father loves the Sweet Science. I don’t recall really seeing my father watch boxing in the past few years, or him ever stepping into a boxing ring for that matter, but he certainly loves the Sweet Science. This one is for you dad. The Sweet Science.

Meet Zachary ‘ZUNGRY’ Ochoa. Very much like many of you, he’s a young man who not only grew up in the Southside of Williamsburg, but is a loyal Мишка fan and loves the brand because “it resembles someone who doesn’t care what anyone else thinks about them and shows creativity in art and the urban culture”. That’s a damn fine interpretation of our brand and pretty accurate assessment of what we’re all about. Growing up in the Southside when it was a lot rougher, Ochoa was forced into situations at an early age that pushed him into fighting. His father showed him how to throw a punch at age 10, but it was his mother’s tough love that landed him in a boxing gym at the age of 13. He’s been hooked on the Sweet Science ever since.

At the age of 14, Zachary ‘ZUNGRY’ Ochoa was named New York State Junior Olympic Champion at 115lbs, EXB Champion 115lbs, & Florida State Platinum Gloves Champion at 119lbs. At age 15, he won Best Knockout in the Junior Olympics, and by the age of 16, he was once again NY State Junior Olympic Champion, at 138lbs, United States North East Regional Champion, New York State LIB Champion, and by 17 he was the NY State Metropolitan Champion at 132lbs.

Pretty impressive for a young Mishkateer wouldn’t you say? After dominating in the Amateur boxing scene, he decided to finish high school (STAY IN SCHOOL KIDS) and began preparing for the next move, professional rankings. He had his first Pro fight in September of 2011 and not only defeated an opponent that boasted a 90 fight record as an amateur, but won Best Knockout of The Night. He also abstains from alcohol and drug use, and stays focused on his passion, boxing. STRAIGHT EDGE YO I SUPPORT THAT FULLY.

So things are fully underway in the NBA Playoffs, and thankfully the Los Angeles Lakers are still alive. As such, I’m able to be here writing this preview, as opposed to curled up in the fetal position in my closet playing with my Kobe Bryant action figures. That’s not really a surprising revelation. This was a strange first round, somehow very predictable but utterly surprising at the same time.

You may scoff (and, to be fair to myself, I had a vague intuition about this very thing happening) but I can’t stress how big Derrick Rose’s injury is both to this playoffs, and potentially the next few years in the NBA. I mean the fact that Doug Collins’ 76ers defeated the Chicago Bulls completed changed the landscape of the East. First of all, congrats to Doug Collins. I like that dude. Second of all, their second round matchup against the Celtics is actually a totally winnable series.

Hell, they almost stole game 1 in TD Garden two nights ago, and the Celtics are only going to get more exhausted and geriatric looking. Speaking of the Celtics, they beat the Hawks. Because they’re the Hawks, so, duh. They continue to be excitement kryptonite. Meanwhile the Heat steamrolled the Knicks, who did a great job of making themselves look foolish (and leaving the Big Apple understandably worried about the future. Theoretically, this should’ve been the best version of the team we’ll see in the Carmelo/Amar’e/Chandler cycle. Uh-oh. Nothing about that longest-playoff-losing-streak-in-history snapping victory felt good at all.

Also, the Heat played well in 4th quarters (and did again last night against the Pacers). Fuuuuuuuck. Speaking of the Pacers, after a bizarre Game 1 loss that I’m going to chalk up to some Illuminati placing a big bet, they made quick work of the crippled Magic. No surprises there. The West played out pretty predictably is well. Spurs had no trouble and continue to fly under the radar looking great. Tim Duncan has presumably just been in a hyperbaric chamber for the past week just… knitting I guess. He probably knits.

The Thunder/Mavericks series, despite ending as a sweep for Oklahoma City, was actually a little closer than the result suggests. Dallas was actually this close to stealing two (two!) games in Oklahoma City, and you know what Dirk is like when he gets on a winning streak. Alas, repeating is hard (unless you’re the Lakers/Celtics/Bulls) and it just wasn’t Dallas’ year. Nevertheless, the apparent lack of home field dominance (weird for a team who’s city is so insanely obsessed with them) bodes well for the Lakers, who blessedly scraped by the Nuggets in a maddening 7 game series that saw Kenneth Faried going off for Denver and Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum playing like Darko Milicic and Joffrey Baratheon, respectively.

But World Peace is back, so all is well. I felt bad for the Grizz, who put up a hell of a fight, but came up against the unstoppable force that is Chris Paul. Watching that series made my blood boil thinking about CP3 in the yellow and purple. I will never, ever forgive David Stern for that. Let’s take a look at round 2!

THE EAST:

2. Miami Heat (Def. Knicks 4-1) Vs. 3. Indiana Pacers (Def. Magic 4-1)

Well, let’s just get it out there: we all saw last night’s game right? This is bizarrely possible. Not probable, no, but it’s in the realm of the real. Sebastian Pruiti, a guy who knows much more than me about the hyperspecific x’s and o’s of the game seems to think this is a rough matchup for the Big Three and after watching last night’s game I would have to agree. Especially since the Big Three has dwindles to two, as Bosh is out indefinitely with an abdominal strain.

If Danny Granger can really kick it into gear, and the Pacers can stay out of the deeply weird foul trouble they found themselves in last night (seriously all their stars either did, or were on the verge of fouling out) we could have a good one on our hands. All that being said… fucking Lebron and Wade. If they play like they did in the second half last night, then forget about the Pacers, I don’t think anyone can take them on. You don’t know how much it pains me to type that. Also, FYI, the Pacers are the only team in the East with a vague chance to stop the Heat’s road to the Finals. Still, Heat in 6.

4. Boston Celtics (Def. Hawks 4-3) Vs. 8. Philadelphia 76ers (Def. Bulls 4-2)

First of all, I can’t help but feel like either of these teams would get slapped around something fierce by either competitor in the other East matchup, but I also called Knicks over Heat so clearly I’m short a few brain cells. Listen: Philly is a perfectly fine team, but they’re not a championship contender team. Point to someone on that roster who will take the last game seven shot and dagger it into their opponent’s heart with aplomb. Yeah, didn’t think so.

So the fact that they almost took the Celtics in Game 1 really makes this feel like the losers bracket. If the Celtics can keep up physically, I think they should have this one, but I really can’t imagine how exhausted they must be. They do have stars though (the Sixers don’t) and never put a playoff series past Paul Pierce and his gross, gross facial hair. Celtics in 7. 

THE WEST:

1. San Antonio Spurs (Def. Jazz 4-0) Vs. 5. Los Angeles Clippers (Def. Grizzlies 4-3)

I’m actually really excited for this series as well. This should be a real bruiser. I imagine that finally getting past the first round of the playoffs will be a big influence on the way this Clippers team plays, and hopefully somebody (anybody!) will step up to help Chris Paul get it done. Now really is the place where Blake Griffin proves himself and becomes the Kobe to CP3s Shaq (don’t call me out for position discrepancies, it’s a feel thing) or fades into the melange of medium-good players that surround a star (like Cleveland era Lebron).

Meanwhile the Spurs… it’s just so hard to say anything exciting or new or interesting about them. Yes, Tony Parker continues to play great. Yes, Boris Diaw was a great, great pickup for them. Yes, they currently have easily the best coaching in the league. No matter what they are a very, very hard team to beat. As always. Spurs in 6. 

2. Oklahoma City Thunder (Def. Mavericks 4-0) Vs. 3. Los Angeles Lakers (Def. Nuggets 4-3)

Divorcing myself from fandom for a second, this is a series that really “means something” no matter who wins it. In a way, it will define the tone of the West for the next few years. This is the perfect test for the Thunder: can the young upstart team upset the vets? Are Durant and Westbrook enough to take on Kobe? Will someone named “World Peace” murder a guy on the court?

Really though, if the Lakers have any chance of beating the Thunder they’re going to have to play like they did in Game 1 of their Nuggets series. That team can easily go to the finals and contend. The Laker team of Game 6 doesn’t even belong in the playoffs. Time to step up Bynum. Lakers in 7, because back off. 

What has been an overly exciting post season in the NHL has dwindled down to four teams. In the west, a team that was once left for dead versus one which was financially dead for quite some time. On the other coast, one of the games’ best rivalries will decide who will compete for Lord Stanley’s Mug. Let’s have a quick peek.

Western Conference :

(3) Phoenix Coyotes vs. (8) Los Angeles Kings

A Cinderella story in the desert has been one of the steadier headlines throughout the post-season as the one-time bankrupt Coyotes have played through much adversity. Whether it was playing in front of near empty seats on a nightly basis or being the butt of jokes of the NHL the Yotes have proved pretty much everyone wrong. Their reward is a maiden voyage for the right to play for The Cup for the first time in franchise history. Their opponent, the Los Angeles Kings, have only played nine games thus far and have won eight of them.

A team which often gets drowned in the glory of the Lakers or the pesky neighboring Ducks, the Kings have went from dark horse to cup favorites in what seemed like mere seconds. Led by Jonathon Quick, LA have reminded people that there are other teams that call the Staples Center home and damn good ones to boot. Game 1 is tonight (8 pm NBCSN)

As far as predicting how this series will go is anyone’s guess because few have imagined this scenario once the playoffs started. Phoenix boast an equally strong net-minder and get scoring from all over the place so it really is anyone’s game. LA in 7.

Eastern Conference :

(1) New York Rangers vs. (6) New Jersey Devils

Unlike in the west, this match up has a bit more wow factor. Two of the games elite goalies, superstar after superstar, enough bad blood to fill up all NYC-area hospitals, all under the bright lights and the supposed allure that is Madison Square Garden. Two teams separated by a short drive or even a long walk will find themselves facing off to represent the east on the biggest possible stage.

This series promises to be better than the actual Cup Finals. If you’ve never watched a game of hockey in your life, now would be the time to do it. This is what a hockey rivalry should be. No kind words, no respect, no nothing. Just blood, sweat, and tears for either the Ranger blue or the Devils red. I get goosebumps just thinking about it. Game 1 is tomorrow night at MSG (8 pm NBCSN)

In case you haven’t noticed in the past posts, I’m quite the Devils fan. There is no reason the Devils can’t wipe the floor with these pretty boys. Rangers Suck. Devils in 6.

Spartak’s Playoff Picks: 5-7 with two perfect series

UFC on FOX once again proves the growth of the sport of Mixed Martial Arts. With their NFL music introduction, educated commentary, and overall real American FOX Sports Broadcastign, sport loving, vegan chicken wing eating, root beer chugging with your friends feel. Did you experience this? I ate pasta with my family actually. It was wonderful.

Let’s jump into it with the heavy weight opening fight of the night. (I’d like to note I’m a horrible human being, and I did not watch the preliminary fights on FUELTV). Pat Barry showed his experience and age in this fight. He’s a great fighter with killer instinct, but when backed into a corner (or the cage rather) he tends to try to exchange shots, as opposed to moving out of the way of the oncoming onslaught that is another 255 lb man’s fists flying at him with might and fury.

I will say this though, I never expected to see Pat Barry mount someone, but his full mount transition into side control showed his lack of ground game knowledge. Lavar Johnson (who looks like Dwayne Johnson really) showed great stand up, and decent cardio, by way of throwing his two boulders of hands at 89mph into Pat Barry’s face and body, ultimately winning the bout in the first round.

Alan Belcher versus Rousimar Palhares. What a spectacular display of finely placed Brazilian Jiu Jitsu this match was. This was like watching a game of chess unfold in the park, except that these men can rip your limbs off and beat you with them, quite the opposite of what most chess players in parks are capable of doing. Except in Russia, I’m sure it’s different there. If you aren’t familiar with Palhares’ record, he’s known to hyper-extend his opponents knees at will.

He walks away with people’s limbs, and gives us a beautiful smile and bows as he does so. Alan Belcher is known for his intense stand up and great Muay Thai, so people already saw Palhares (pronounced PAUL HARRIS) taking the W with this one. Boy were those Jabroni’s wrong. These men met at the mat, and Belcher began to attempt a twister (a magical submission, originated by wrestlers) and the rolling began. Palhares has his legs, Belcher knows how to defend. Root beer is spilling, children are crying, these men are rolling.

You keep expecting Palhares to rip his leg clear off, until Belcher jumps into Palhares’ guard. Alan Belcher then postures up, and proceeds to drop elbows and fists directly into Rousimar’s grill until the referee decides that Palhares (Paul Harris) is no longer capable of performing in a sanctioned fight. GOOD CALL. Alan Belcher shocks the world and takes the win. THAT’S A BAD MAN! He also looks like my tattoo guy. Important to note.

The Josh Koscheck/Johny Hendricks fight was not bad if you’re an avid MMA fan, but for some I can see how it might’ve come across as a bit lack luster. Lots of strong clinching up, great punches were thrown. Koscheck proves his face is made out of a steel alloy. Hendricks takes the win by split decision, and shows great beard work.

Our final fight of the night which took place in Jim Miller’s own back yard (NEW JERSEY BRO) proved to be a great one. Jim Miller opens up aggressive and strong, with leg kicks to Diaz and clinch work against the cage. Diaz seems to go about unfazed by this though, with one minute left, he dropped Jim Miller with a straight left. Or maybe a right… A little rolling on the ground follows and it seems as though Diaz is a little more comfortable and fluent with the Jiu Jitsu.

After a barrage of classic Diaz peppering punches through out the bout, he drops Jim Miller and goes in for a sick guillotine looking hold that I picture only advanced Jiu Jitsu gods being able to use in a match. Jim Miller is submitted (which he has never been done professionally) by Diaz, earning Nick Diaz a shot at the UFC Light Weight Title. YOU HEAR THAT SUCKA? WE COMING FOR YOU N____!